Bear

Chapter 40

I was shaking. I was panting. I couldn't see straight.

Covering my mouth, I leaned onto the table and closed my eyes. I sat there for a while before composing myself and collecting my stuff. I walked out to the front desk and dropped off some paperwork.

"Hey, do you feel ok?" Stacey asked from behind me.

"Um, yeah. No. I don't know. I just need to get home." I said as I rubbed my head.

"Ok, have a good night." she said as I walked out and got in my car.

I drove to Mom's to pick up Izzy. When I walked inside, Izzy told me all about what they did that day. She showed me the pictures she painted that were on the counter, the windmill flowers they made, and even the popsicles they made with gummy bears and sprite.

"Can you stay for a little while?" Mom asked me to collect the paintings, and taped one on her fridge.

"Yeah, we can." I said with a small smile.

We made a cake, and Izzy of course wanted to stir, so it made it all that much more entertaining. Izzy chose a chocolate cake, and Mom helped her make cream cheese frosting for it.

We decided to stay for dinner too, and we made pancakes, because that's what Izzy wanted. I cut up fruit and put it in a bowl as Izzy carefully mixed it. Mom set her little table, as Izzy and I walked the food over. We all sat down to eat, and I poured everyone a cup of juice.

"Gigi..." Izzy asked.

"What honey?"

"Do you have peanut butter?"

Mom's face fell before she quickly recovered. "Yes, I do honey." She said with a small forced smile. She stood up and got the peanut butter, and a knife. She spread it over Izzy's little pancakes, before sitting back down.

I tried to discreetly wipe away the tears that were in my eyes. We ate our dinner, and had cake while we listened to Izzy tell us stories she made up. Mom and I laughed at her made up words.

We said goodbye to Mom and headed home after dark. I got Izzy into jammies and tucked her into bed.

"Goodnight sweetie." I said as I kissed her forehead.

"Goodnight Mommy." She said as I shut off her light.

As I walked down the hall to the stairs, I heard Damien's voice say, "I love you baby girl."

Liam got home as I was changing into a t-shirt to sleep in. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed up my cheek.

"Hi." He said before kissing my cheek again.

"Hi." I said as I stepped out of his arms. I pulled on a pair of leggings before saying, "Izzy asked me to sleep with her tonight, so I'm going to go upstairs." I lied.

"Oh, ok." he said with a shrug.

I turned off the light in the closet, and walked back upstairs, and into Izzy's room. I made sure my alarm was set for the morning, and I put my phone on the table by her bed. I carefully slid under the covers, and wrapped my arms around her and laid awake thinking of Damien.

...

The next morning I got up and got Izzy dressed. She was going with Mom again today. I turned on quiet cartoons while I got ready and dressed in the bedroom while Liam slept.

I quickly showered, and decided to just let my hair air dry, rather than turning on the blow drier. I put on a little mascara and lip gloss, and went to the closet. I pulled on dark jeans and a Navy blue sweater with a brown buckle on the side. I put on matching brown knee high boots, and quietly walked back into the kitchen.