Idk why but im getting so so scared..of everything..of life.i was doing better.i really am..but rn getting lil panicky,just wanting to die...n lil freaking out n crying..n i looked at my friends list..n realising u dont know who to text ,realising in the end ur alone anyways...or me..
Theres still this guy,hes my everything but i dont think he'll go for me,i was keeping hope,i was being strong,wouldnt think like that anymore n ignore it n be confident about this but the longer its going n the less fucks he seems to give..the more it hurts and the more that i think that hes just waiting to find an excuse..or hes just gonna fall for someone else
I mean look at me..its not like im anything special,not in the good way atleast
Tbh now i just want the threats my classmates gave me to become true..idk..bleeding out in pain slowly,but not having the internal,mind crushing pain,constant overthinking and all..sounds pretty nice
Idk what im worth
The guy makes me more confident..makes mw feel cute somethimes
But lets be honest..im to puke
Its surprising some people still want me as a friend..
I know you'll read this chelsea and i love you boo but im sorry i cant..
I know im not a bother to you but i still cant
Its somethimes all just too hard and thats when everything falls down n i just get in a sad mood
And everything.becomes depressing
I currently just wish i was dead but im just having another one of those sad moments
Dad shouted again,yay..he scares me so much somethimes...
I love you all..and care for you all❤
Im sorry
Goodnight ❤
YOU ARE READING
my diary
RandomWarning,this may containt triggering stuff,idk I just write how i feel,dont take this personally Its my way to get it out without bothering someone..somethimes idk who to talk to..so i come here..
