Broken Beyond Repair

Chapter XII: Back Here Again

~Recap~

His words felt heavy in my chest. Damien wasn't forcing me to go back with him. He knew he messed up. Gosh I love him so much. He even admitted it. I don't know what to say!

Damien- Sophia, what's your choice?

His voice was ragged and coarse from chasing me around. Damien what should I do?

"Damien, I-"

~~~~~~~

"Damien, I can't go with you," I said. My voice was shaking so much. It would be impossible to steady it.

His breath left his body. You could see it in his expression. Damien gave out either from shock or exhaustion. Falling to his knees, a few tears fell down his cheeks. But behind those tears I could see his rage.

Damien had grabbed onto my hands, holding them close. He looked like a small child kneeling down.

Damien took a deep breath and said, "Ok. But why Sophia?"

I really did want to go with him, but what would it cost me?

Sophia- Look Damien it's just-

He got up from the ground throwing his arms around me. Damien laid his head on my chest hugging my body tighter. Initially I was shocked, but I loved his warm embrace. Pulling my own arms around him, I laid my head on his own, "Damien I do owe you an explanation," I held him tighter, mulling over my words, "You were right."

He brought his puppy face up from its hiding place. "What do you mean?"

"You can't prevent the inevitable. You said it yourself."

I felt Damien's hands fall past me. He was in utter shock. I didn't regret it, mostly. It was true I knew I would have to leave. That was never going to change. I couldn't let it.

~Damien's Perspective~

She said no. Sophia didn't love me like I loved her.

I didn't even mean to, but I felt myself jumping up to hug her. I buried my face into her chest while holding her torso tightly.

If I force her to come with me she'll hate me, but I can't stand idly by and watch her leave my life forever. So maybe, just maybe I can have this. Just to feel her touch one more time.

Sophia- I do owe you an explanation. You were right.

Damien- What do you mean.

I looked up and Sophia was confused. Where was this going?

Sophia- You can't prevent the inevitable. You said it yourself.

A knife was stabbed through my heart, or that's at least what it felt like. I let go of Sophia backing away. The same girl I met a few days ago now wrapped into this whole mess.

I could feel it. The urge to hurt someone was invading my mind. So I walked away. I couldn't afford to hurt anyone, especially Sophia. I needed control to feel like I have control over this awful urge.

I got back on the same bus I took to find Sophia. My house felt more empty than it ever had before. All of my belongings were still thrown about the house. I didn't feel like cleaning it up or doing anything for the matter.

I hung on to the feeling of Sophia in my arms, knowing I would never feel that again.

There it was the letter She wrote me. Still in the same place I left it. But it had no pull towards me. Maybe I should just burn it. Sophia clearly didn't mean anything in that note. Just empty words that once filled my heart.