When Everything Falls (De Chaves #1)

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

The impeding tears at the side of my eyes were planting a bearable twinge in me. With the soft cradle of the frigid wind together with the faint silver light coming from the sun that was blocked by the thick bank of clouds, I scurried my way out of the University. If only I had known that this first day of class would ruin my mind, I wouldn't have attended. Biting my lower lip, my heart cannot accustom the pain Bellamy had to give me. My heart was constricting painfully over and over again as I paced the way out of the premises of the University.

It was hard to preempt the l tears to flow from my eyes. To hide my bloodshot eyes from anyone, I ducked my head and let my hair cascade over the side of my face as if preventing anyone to see the plaguing melancholy on my face. It was so hard to extrude myself from the University. Kaya no'ng nakarating na ako sa terminal ng tricycle ay laking pasasalamat ko.

When a tricycle driver asked me if I'll go home, I just nodded. Fortunately, all the drivers here knew the location of our house so I didn't need to speak. Considering the lump of my throat that seemed to have obstructed, I knew that I couldn't deliver a straight sentence to answer. I knew that even a single world that I may utter, my voice would break and that was the last thing I wanted to happen. As I slid inside the tricycle, I felt the irksome dryness wrapping around my throat as I thought about Bellamy; about how decisively good he was to convey such emotions like that. How can he be so cruel for wanting to hurt me over and over again? Never did I step onto someone, nor did I speak ill to anyone and I didn't know the reason why Bellamy was doing this to me.

It was for Lilith, I thought. It was all about Lilith. She was not content with the result of the ploy they created so Bellamy was not pleased and wanted to make it better— to hurt me until I bleed. Unconsciously, I dug my fingers on my wrist, but the pain it caused was nothing compared to the pain my heart was having. Tears flowed from my eyes, it was a tear filled with emotions, tear that implied sadness, tear that represented the turmoil within me. With the rapid intake of breath, I closed my eyes as the tears erupted from my eyes.

Silent sobs, shaky breath, pounding heart, and dying melody. I didn't know why I was being like this, why I was having this kind of pain. I should not be having this kind of pain. Sa kaunting panahon na nakasama ko si Bellamy, dapat ay hindi ganitong sakit ang naidulot niya. Pero bakit sa kaunting panahon na iyon, nakaya niya akong wasakin ng ganito? Alam kong may kasalanan din naman ako, I let him get into my life; so I needed to face the consequences of my action.

Sa pagdating ko sa bahay, naroon si Mama. Nag-aayos siya sa sala. Hindi ko alam kung anong nangyari sa kanila ni Alejandro at hindi ko na rin nakikita ang manyakis na iyon dito sa bahay. I hoped that they separated. My mother didn't deserve that kind of disgusting old balding man. Neither did I deserve an asshole like Bellamy de Chavez. Clenching my jaw, I feigned an expression just to mask the sadness plagued on my face.

"Oh, ang aga mo ata, Lia? Half-day?" Tanong ni Mama at tinignan ako ng mabuti.

I shook my head, "Sumakit lang ang ulo ko. Sige po, pasok na muna ako sa kwarto."

"Oh, sige." She said and gathered the sex toys that scattered on the sofa, "May pupuntahan pala kami ni Maripusa. Baka gabi na kami makauwi. Kung nagugutom ka, may binili naman ako doon. Magluto ka nalang."

I nodded and pivoted, hindi ko na kayang pigilan ang luha ko, "O-okay. Mag-ingat po kayo."

Hindi ko na hinintay na makasagot ang aking ina. I sauntered my way to my room and locked the door and slammed my back against it. Slowly, I collapsed behind the door and folded my legs and buried my chin on my knees as I wrapped my arms around. Sobbing silently, I poured my pain out. Akala ko ba ay tapos na ako sa pag-iyak? Bakit ngayon umiiyak na naman ako? Hindi na ba matatapos itong sakit? Dapat kasi ay kalimutan ko na si Bellamy, pero papaano? If someone knew the steps of forgetting someone, I trade all the penny I had just so I would learn those steps. Closing my eyes tightly, I heard the growling of thunder up above.