When Words Become Superfluous

A Kind of Nostalgia

        “Imagining the future is a kind of nostalgia. You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you'll escape it one day, and how awesome it will be, and imagining that future keeps you going, but you never do it. You just use the future to escape the present.”

~John Green

        Evie watched as the door banged open again. The second session was over. It had surprised her at first when instead of the beating the unsub inflicted on Spencer the first time, he had nearly choked him to death. Then she remembered the pictures of the other victims. There was no single type of torture with this unsub, he was going to try it all. The thought made Evie sick, and if she had anything to eat earlier she may have thrown up her stomach contents, but lately it has just fallen to the point where she huddled in her cell in tears, gagging since there was nothing left to come up. 

The unsub appeared in the doorway, dragging Spencer the same way as he had after the first session, but this time he was soaked and still had no shirt on. The blood was completely washed away from his bruises and open wounds on his chest and ribs. There was a deep gash in his skin from his left hip to the bottom of his rib cage that was cleaned up so that Evie could perfectly see it. As the unsub dragged an unconscious Spence by her cell, she expected him to keep going, but he didn’t. The unsub stopped in front of the bars of her room and held Spencer up with one arm to fish out his keys with another. Evie could hear her heartbeat and feel it against her chest. It was her turn. She could hold Spence and take care of him now. 

The door clanked open and with a grunt, the unsub hoisted Reid through the threshold. Evelyn gasped as he nearly hit the ground, but her instincts kicked in before her mind and she rushed forward to catch him. He was freezing cold from his waist up, his hair soaked and matted on his forehead. His lips had the faintest tint of blue if you looked close enough, but the worst part was… he wasn’t breathing. 

“Spence?” Evie called his name, not even acknowledging the unsub who snarled at her before slamming the door shut. Spencer didn’t respond. He didn’t even move. She knew it couldn’t be good. She had watched the unsub hold him underwater while he struggled. After a little over a minute, he didn’t struggle anymore. The unsub yanked him out, pressed on his stomach a few times with rough compressions until Spencer coughed out water. Then once Evie watched Spencer regain his air back on the TV screen, the unsub did it all over again. He had done it four times in total. Now Reid wasn’t breathing or moving. 

Evie frantically pressed two fingers underneath his jawline, feeling for a pulse. Her heart skipped a beat when she couldn’t find one at first, but suddenly she felt it. It was faint but she felt it. 

“Oh my god, oh my god…” she whimpered, lying Spencer on the ground so he was on his back. “He’s not breathing and his pulse is fading! What do I do!” she asked, her voice about to break into sobs instead. 

“Alright, alright. Calm down, Ev. Do you know how to deliver chest compressions?” Morgan’s voice called from his place across the hall. Evie squeezed her eyes shut and remembered back to her FBI training. She nodded her head. 

“Yes, yes…” 

“Deliver thirty. Remember to keep it at the right pace.” Hotch’s voice joined in. Evie realized her hands were shaking as she got up on her knees and kneeled over Spencer’s lifeless body. She pressed the shaking heel of her palm into the middle of his chest, placing the other on top. She pushed as hard as she could, which at this point, wasn’t very hard. Spencer jerked with her movements as she kept going, counting in her head. 

One… Two… Three… Four… 

“You’re going to have to press down harder than that, sweetheart.” Morgan said, eyeing her from behind his bars. Evie let out a half breath half sob noise and nodded. She kept her compressions going, watching Spencer’s face for any signs of life as she did. He was so pale… so… dead looking.