When Words Become Superfluous

Deep Into Darkness

"Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before."

~Edgar Allan Poe

"I love you..." he heard Evie say. Spencer replayed the words over and over in his mind. "I love you, I love you, I love you..." , but he couldn't bring himself to say 'I love you too'. His mouth wouldn't move no matter how much he willed it to. He tried his legs, his arms, his hands, his fingers, and even his eyes, but nothing would move. He was trapped in a deep abyss filled with nothing but darkness and the sound of Evie's voice talking to him.

Where was he? What happened? Why did it sound like Evie was crying?

Don't cry... Spencer thought, wanting her to hear him but knowing she couldn't. He could imagine her face as she sat next to him, her eyes red, her hair spilling over half of her face He longed to see her, to hold her, to assure her everything was going to be alright. He just couldn't move though. It ws like he was stuck in a never ending nightmare where he could reach out for Evie but he couldn't get to her. He fell just a bit short every time.

"It has to be nice and open, with nice hardwood floors." Evie said, explaining how their first house would be. Spencer smiled, not physically but mentally as he listened to her.

And lots of bookshelves. He thought to himself as if he were talking to her.

"There will be a lot of big windows to show off our gorgeous landscaping."

And a fireplace to cuddle by.

"A deck to sit out on in the Summer."

Hot tub too?

"A room for each of the kids. We can paint them ourselves!"

Riiiight, because I definitely know how to paint...

"A reallllly nice master bathroom because I need my space in the morning! And a nice big shower, for Mommy and Daddy." Evie added. Spencer could hear the smile playing on her lips.

Yeah... I'd like that. He thought, imagining having a family with Evie. It was all he ever wanted now. He really was the luckiest person alive, despite the fact he was nearly tortured to death a while ago. He wasn't even sure how long ago it was. He could barely remember the FBI barging in the last second. Spencer was sure if they didn't when they did, he'd be dead by now. Being in a strange deep sleep, coma ordeal was better than dead. At least he could hear her voice.

"I love you so much, Spence." Evie said again. Reid became even more determined this time. He had to let her know that he loved her too. How could he do that, though? Spencer concentrated on moving his hand. If he could actually feel the muscles in his face, his eyebrows would be furrowed with concentration. He was sure that he just remained motionless however.

Spencer could feel Evie's hand in his own. He was so close, so close to being able to just barely move it, he could feel it. It was one of the most frustrating experiences.

Come on, come on... he thought to himself. With all of the energy he had, Spencer thought about his hand wrapped and Evie's and he could've sworn he moved his index finger just the slightest bit. Evie reinforced his belief.

"Spence?" she whispered, grabbing onto his hand tighter. The weight of her head on his pillow lifted, and he could feel her hair brush up against his cheek as she peered down at him. What he'd give to just open his eyes to stare into her beautful gray ones. "Spencer, can you hear me."

Yes, yes I promise I can hear you. I'm trying, Evs. He longed to say. Instead he remained still, all of the energy sucked out of him from when he barely moved his finger. When a response from Spencer didn't come, Evelyn sighed and lied back down on the pillow next to Spencer. He wanted to ask her to just wrap her arm around him. She wouldn't hurt him. His body was too numb for that. He knew that Evelyn would be terrified of harming him though, so he could definitely take holding hands with gratitude.