Those Who Stare Into the Sun

Chapter Fourteen: London fireworks

My attraction for him was a fact. But I couldn't shake off this little memory I had of him being married. Not that I was sure that he was coming on to me, cause maybe this was his nature. But it sure felt like it, how surreal that might be.

"Yes, you could say that." I started to look around at the people surrounding us. Was someone watching— judging? No. Everyone was occupied with drinking, laughing and talking. It felt like almost everyone knew each other, except me.

A man passed us and greeted Cillian, then he looked at me with a face like: "Who is she, anyway?"

Cillian turned to me again, looking a little guilty. "So, I actually haven't heard of you before."

"No, it makes sense. Since I've never acted before" I said grinning.

"Ever?" He seemed confused.

"Not om screen anyway. I've done some community theater and been the occasional extra in some small movie, but never anything like this. I'm very lucky."

He nodded, but sort of indifferent. "So this is where it all starts for you."

"Mm, I don't know. One can only hope."

Cillian sort of squinted his eyes and watched me intensly. "Don't be so modest."

"I'm not" I laughed, "For exempel - I have no idea what I'm gonna do after this."

"Hm", he just said and kept looking at me with those piercing eyes. After a few seconds my face cracked up in this huge smile, since I felt so uncomfortable with him looking at me like that— but in a good way. Oh dear, I was really in trouble.

To my rescue came Tom, playfully knocking his elbow into the side of Cillians stomach. Cillian played along, knocking Tom back inte the face. Then they laughed and hugged. Ironically it was one of the sexiest things I ever saw. I remembered knowing they were good friends, and had made several movies together.

"So, you found her, didn't you", Tom said and looked between me and Cillian. "You guys having a nice time?"

I nodded, a little embarassed. A moment later Cary, Laura and Toms wife joined us. I stood there politely, listening to what they were saying, but I really wanted to see what Peter was up to right now. Maybe he was talking to someone I hadn't met. So I could simply walk into the conversation.

"Excuse me" I said carefully, "I'm just going to—" But I realized that they wouldn't even notice if I left - they were all so caught up in the conversation.

So I snuck off, heading for the lavatories before I would go to find Peter. I focused on smiling to the people I passed, and most of them smiled back. I really had to start my mingle.

I started to dig in my purse to look for my makeup, as a girl joined me in the bathroom.

"Who are you?", she asked bluntly, heading for the mirror.

"Oh, uhm— hi, I'm Anya Frost" I said and we shook hands. "I play the dealer at the casino."

"Oh right", she said, "I'm Novelle Blanks, nice meeting you."

She swept her eyes all over me, and then came really close.

"You're really beautiful", she said.

"Oh— t-thank you."

"Hm", she said. "I actually recognize you now that you said that. I'm one of the lighters on set. So I saw you when you were shooting the other week. You were good."