Where Do I Belong??

Prologue

Evelyn's PoV

"Eve, you can't do this to me. I am not a naïve, stupid girl. you think I don't know what you are doing to me, to my dreams. You can't clip my wings"  Elle yelled on the top of her lungs, her voice was shriller and trembling with each syllable. She gave me a final look of disgust and stormed out of the hall.

I grabbed my head in my hands in frustration. Teenagers are really difficult to raise. I wonder how difficult it would be to raise my own children.

What am I even talking? I don't even think I will have any. Will I ever fall in love? Or rather why would anyone fall for me? I have a baggage of responsibilities, why would anyone wanna be burdened by bring me into his life?

I am raising two siblings since I myself was a teenager. Gosh.. I won't get to live my life ever.

Elle is my younger sister, she is 16 and wants to go for high school abroad. I can't , I just can't afford that with Belle's responsibilities it is too difficult to let her follow her dreams. It is really not possible for me to do everything all alone.

Isabelle, the youngest of us , is turning eight this week. She is too young to be burdened with such talks. I always try to keep her away from these types of conversations. But today was different. I came home from work and found Elle filling a form of some university in New York. I didn't want to control her but practically it isn't possible for me to send her all alone to another continent.

I tried explaining myself to her but nope, everything went to deaf ears. She, as usual yelled at me and threw her tantrums at me. Again!

Belle was asleep but she woke up startling at her sister's raised tone. Anyways, it was time for her to wake up. It's time for school, already. I took a deep breath, when I heard Belle's steps approaching me. She rubbed her eyes, pouting and frowning at Elle's door, talking small steps into the kitchen.

We live in a one bedroom and a hall cum kitchen, apartment. Belle and Elle live in the bedroom and the hall is occupied by me.  I couldn't afford a better place than this. It is not a better locality to live in yet we have been living here for 7 years now and everyone knows us. Mrs. Smith, our neighbour is always there for my kiddos if I am not. She makes sure to keep the gate close all the time when I am at work for the whole night. Yes, the whole night because I start working at 8pm, I am a singer. No no. It's not really a proud moment for anyone. I am a singer at a strippers club where I have to wear a bikni and sing in a seductive tone, my friends strips there clothes and show off their perfectly hot body. They are even allowed to sell their bodies to the highest bidder. Although, I am not one of them yet I am treated no less. People look at me as a stripper and our manager really offers me to sell my body. Since I am not interested in doing so , he somehow is convinced not to force me into anything I don't want to.
I am 24, alone, ever since our parents died, my life has stopped or one can say it has started being as cruel as it could be. I want a life free of all this chaos, miseries and responsibilities.

That's because I hate it. I hate it because I am tired, tired of doing things I never wished to do and never wanted to. I hate being a strippers singer. I hate everything of my life except my darling siblings. Our parents died when I was 17 , Elle was just 9 and Belle was just 1then. For Belle , I am her mother, she knows about mum and dad but she has been taken care of by me as her mother.

Even Elle loves her and makes my life alot easier by helping us into all the household chores. She understands how difficult it was for me to earn a living, to give them a normal life. But she has way different dreams, dreams that could hurt her. I don't want her to curb her desires, but I am afraid let her go where she wants, to let her follow her dreams.