They were done with the interview sooner than expected. The word was finally out, Christine McVie joined the other four current members of Fleetwood Mac and told into one of the cameras herself, that she had rejoined the band after sixteen years. It felt good, to all of them. The energy was great, they had more fun than arguments, despite a few teasing moments here and there. When there was nothing left to do in Stevie's house, where the interview took place, the three British members left, while Lindsey allegedly had something very important to tell Stevie. At least that's how he put it in front of Christine, Mick and John.
“It’s getting old, Stevie.” Lindsey said, once they were alone.
“What is?” The two were sitting on the couch in the same room the interview was filmed in minutes ago.
“You’re not stupid, you know what I’m talking about."
“No, Lindsey, you’re dancing around the subject and it’s annoying the hell out of me.” Stevie was too interested in her yorkie than her band mate.
“It’s just… You always keep me hanging onto you."
“Excuse me?” Her dog was forgotten as her eyes grew wide.
“Whenever we see each other, you let me touch you, you let me be around you, you let me talk to you the way I shouldn’t and I can seem to get away, you keep giving me false hope, Stevie.”
“Now that is a lot coming from you!” She stood up to make some space between them. “I am the one feeding you lies, is that what you’re saying? Lindsey, I told you I loved you, I wanted to get back together and you said, sure, Stevie, yes absolutely, then you went and got a woman pregnant, who's twenty odd years younger than you! You’re never the one who’s asked how is it to be single at sixty five, how is it not to have a family. No, you always get the questions about your wonderful kids and beautiful wife.”
“You know I don’t love Kristen.”
“I don’t care, Lindsey. Not anymore. As much as I hate you I will always love you to some level no matter what. I don’t always hold your hand intentionally or get a little too close to your side, it’s just… gee, I’ve known you since I was seventeen, it’s natural to me.”
“Is having sex with me still natural as well?”
“You tell me?” Stevie put her hands on her hips, challenging him. “Is it okay to cheat on your wife with someone who you broke up thirty eight years ago? Does that sound alright, Lindsey? I don’t think I’m keeping you hanging onto me, it’s just that you don’t want it any other way.”
Lindsey was stunned. He had to admit to himself, Stevie was telling the truth. He wanted her in ’97 when The Dance happened and Kristen was an accident, yet he chose, no, Stevie told him to stay with a woman he got pregnant. It was never his decision and that is why he never completely got over his girlfriend he met in high school at sixteen.
“It’s all my fault. I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have come at you like that.”
Stevie’s eyebrow rose. “Are you saying you’re wrong?”
Lindsey nodded avoiding her gaze. “If I didn’t want you, I would stop, but I do and I can’t.”
“Don’t you think you should reconsider it all? Don’t you think it’s about time we stop this?” Stevie walked back to where Lindsey was sitting. He couldn’t resist taking her tiny hand in his and kissing it. She smiled sadly. “This is exactly what I had in mind, Linds.”
“I understand, but…” He shrugged. “You’re so familiar, Steph. I know you.”
“That is true, but you decided over fifteen years ago that what you wanted is a family. I couldn’t give you that anymore and you have it now, you’ve had it for a long time and you can’t risk it, I’m not worth it, Lindsey.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“I mean it.” Despite herself, she sat down on his lap and he wrapped his arms around her waist. “We’ve had so many great times, Linds, no matter what, the love was always there, but… we obviously weren’t meant to grow old together. Kristen forgave you once, she’s not going to again.”
"It must have been so hot."
"What are you talking about?"
"When she walked in on us."
"Oh, right! My head in your lap, I bet she freaking loved seeing that!"
Lindsey laughed, shaking his head and returned to the actual conversation. “I don’t need her forgiveness, Stevie, I don’t love that woman.”
“Then what are you saying exactly, Linds? Are you going to get a divorce? No, you promised me that one too many times and I don’t expect any sort of that thing to happen. You live a good life, you don’t need to be all adventurous anymore.”
“You know why I like keeping you to myself?”
“Why’s that?” Stevie chuckled making some distance so they could look at each other.
“Because I get so insanely jealous when another man so much as touches you, hell... looks at you!"
“You realize you don’t have a right to, yeah?”
“That’s the thing, I know I don’t, but I still get mad.”
She sighed deeply shaking her head. “You are mad, Lindsey Buckingham.”
“Every time I think of you with someone else, how they get to have you close, how they get to touch you intimately, how they get to whisper you naughty things, how they get to kiss your lips, how they get to make love to you…”
“If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t made love to anyone since you.”
“What?” Lindsey couldn’t believe it and he didn’t even try to hide his shock.
“Don’t get me wrong, men still come and go, but it’s purely physical, none of them make me feel the way you do, did… They’re all mindless one night stands.”
“Oh… I thought you have been celibate.”
Stevie’s dirty husky laugh threw him back a little. “Come on, Linds, it’s me, you claimed you knew me. I might be turning sixty six, but that’s no stopping me.”
“Crushing my hopes here, Nicks.”
“I have needs, darling.”
“You’ve always had too many.” She let that slide. “I… ignore me.”
They were staring at each other. Stevie was always the most beautiful woman to him, her eyes were so captivating, her skin always felt perfect against his, he loved her gorgeous silky soft hair, he adored her womanly curves. She was the perfect woman to him.
“I want you.”
“You can’t have me, Lindsey.”
“Can I at least have you on the couch for a little while?”
“I’d love to, but it’s going to lead to a little while in the bedroom and in the kitchen and in the pool and in the dressing rooms and in the hotel rooms and we’ll find ourselves in another affair, Linds.”
“Would it be so bad?”
“Wife. You have a wife.”
“Hasn’t stopped us before.”
Stevie stood up and crossed her arms over her chest. “Linds, I think it’s time for you to go. We’ll see each other shortly.”
“How is August shortly?”
“You know what I mean…” She went over to look out the window.
She felt his presence behind her and her resistance started melting right away. His hands settled on her hips and he lowered his head to nuzzle her neck. “At least one more time, Steph, please…” He whispered, pleaded her. “I need you badly, baby.”
It was getting harder and harder to fight the feeling inside her. She turned around in his embrace and kissed him first. He responded instantly as they fought for dominance in their passionate kiss.
They both knew it could never be the last time.
