Don't Forget

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TRIGGER WARNING

Lilly's POV

I watched helplessly as the truck cut off the SUV, and knew that we were going to hit it next. Except this time, Demi was in the driver's seat. I shook her and shook her, but she wouldn't wake up. It's all your fault. It's all your fault. Why would I hurt her like this? I took a small piece of glass and ran it down both my wrists, I knew it was too late to save her so I had to die too so I could be with her again. Suddenly, my father smashed a beer bottle over my head, and everything went black.

I woke up with tears rolling down my face, and had to cover my mouth so I didn't scream and wake up Demetria. I guess she must've heard me moving, because she woke up and kissed me softly.

"Lil, what's wrong?" Demi wiped the tears off my face.

"Bad dream." I muttered.

"Well, let's get off this couch and go to bed. As much as I love cuddling with you, I need room to sleep."

We trudged up the stairs half asleep, and I kept thinking how I hurt her. How I hurt my mom and my dad and Anna and everyone around me.

"Demetria, I'm going to the bathroom and I have to take off my makeup. I'll be out in a few minutes." I called over to her.

I shut the door softly and locked it. I let out a low sob and could feel the thoughts racing through my head.

Dumb bitch, you're just fucking up everyone's lives. You're the reason your mom is dead, your dad is in prison, and Anna hates you because you're not good enough. My demons roared inside of me. You're only good to us, we're always here for you. Now cut. I obeyed and took my razor.

Good girl. One for your mom, I slid my blade across my wrist, one for your dad, another line, one for Anna, blood poured out of a third cut, and one for Demi. But it wasn't enough. I slid down my pants partially and slashed at my hip. See, don't you feel better? We're only here to help you.

I cleaned up my cuts and climbed into bed. Demi wrapped her arms around me and I winced when her arm accidentally hit my hip.

"What was that?" She questioned me with suspicious eyes.

"Nothing! You just accidentally hit a nerve."

I don't think she bought it, but she didn't say anything. I felt awful lying to her, but I didn't want to be a burden at all. She's done so much for me and I don't want her to think that it was her fault or that I was ungrateful. I fell asleep with tears in my eyes, cuts stinging.

Demi's POV

I knew she was lying.But I understood how hard it was to talk about cutting, I had gone through the same thing. Before Lilly woke up, I snuck out of bed and managed to cook breakfast without burning my house down. I had just opened up the door to our room with the tray of food when I saw her wake up. When she saw the food, her jaw dropped.

"YOU cooked, and didn't burn down the house?!" she exclaimed. I playfully slapped her on the shoulder. In one quick move before she could react, I slid up the sleeves on her shirt and gasped. Her wrist was so mutilated, and it broke my heart. I felt tears run down my face, and saw Lilly put her head down. I lifted up her arm and kissed every cut. I took her face in my hands and stared into her eyes.

"I knew last night babe. I know it's hard, but you have to tell me. I'm only here for support and yes, it hurts that you still are battling your demons, but it hurts more that you won't tell me. I really think you need to see a therapist." I said with concerned eyes.

She continued to look down, without saying a word. A minute passed, and she finally spoke. "I-I'm sorry Dems. I'm ashamed of what I am, and just scared."

"Look at me. Never in a million years, and I mean it, should you ever be ashamed. You're so strong for just being here and existing. I'm so proud that I have you. It's always okay to ask for help, asking for help actually shows strength in my eyes."

She kissed me gently, and I lay her back down slowly on the bed. We kissed and cuddled all throughout the morning, until I had to get ready for an interview. I got up and watched my beautiful girlfriend sleep, breathing in and out gently, peacefully. I took a picture and chuckled to myself. She would kill me when she saw it, but I thought it was adorable. I kissed her on the forehead, left her a note, and left for my interview.

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