Love adventure

Love.

The rest of my break was hell. I went back and fourth from visiting family. I ignored my friends texts. I would leave my phone at home and come home to messages from Sussy and Sammy saying things like,
Are you okay? Please call me!

But I wasn't interested in explaining what happened. I didn't want to talk to anyone. Even my parents became worried but I always had an excuse. I was tired or sore from my jogs. You can say I became pretty depressed. I wasn't use to being lied to like Jack lied to me. That day where we both opened up to each other made me fall for him and I thought the feeling was mutual. So of course when I found everything was a lie, I was broken.  Anyway,

Today was Christmas Eve, and I wasn't excited. I didn't like how my parents spend so much money this time of year to make us "happy". A new laptop or phone won't make me happy. They just never understood that. This year our family party was going to be in our small apartment. We didn't have much family. Just two aunts and their three kids each.

I was getting ready when I hear my phone ring. I rolled my eyes knowing it would be Sussy but its a random number I've never seen before so I answer in curiosity.

"Hello?"

"Red?"

I now knew exactly who it was. I immediately wanted to hang up but I couldn't. I was happy to hear his voice.
"Jack? What do you want?"

"Roxanne. Please let me talk to you and explain. The way things were left off were not right. You don't know the truth"

I knew I didn't know the truth. I was well aware of that. Was I really going to let him lie again and make this a cycle where we fight, apologize, hug and fight again.
"I don't think I can hear you lie to me again. This has happened before were we talk things through, we're fine for a split second then something comes up again. I'm done" I hung up without hearing another word. My eyes filled with tears and my throat stung with pain. All I could do is cry.
"Rox, what's wrong? I can't have you crying over this boy. Come here" my mom held me while I cried trying to speak.
"Shh. Its okay. I know this may hurt now but it will get better. Its going to hurt like hell but just wait okay" each word made me feel better. My mom always had me when no one else did.
"I'm sorry mom. Its just that I really fell for Jack. So quickly and I guess that's why it went all wrong. It happened so fast and I still don't know why" I explained to my mom.
"Honey, love doesn't have a time. It just happens. Whether it takes a second or a life time. Love is love. And love hurts rox. Its no walk in the park. Its more like a hike. Trust me, if this boy if worth it then you'll know." As she said those words I couldn't help but feel better. Could my feelings towards Jack be love?
"Mom, in your opinion what is love?" I looked up at my mom for an answer.
"Love is pain and happiness. Love is when you forget that millions of other people exist" Those words made so much sense and now I knew that what I felt could be love. Not just some jerk boy crush.

Family came over and we had dinner and waited for 12 to open our presents. I didn't have a cousin my age to hang around with so I was stuck with my younger siblings. By 9pm I was bored and went outside for some air.

Everything looked so beautiful. The house lights and the dark sky.

"Red?" I jumped when I heard that. I looked over and see Jack wearing a tux. A tux on Christmas eve? It looked sloppy like if he was pushed around or something. His face was flooded with sadness. I could see his red eyes filled with tears. I was shooked at what I was looking at.
"Jack. What the hell are you doing here?!"
"I love you."

What did I just hear?! I rolled my eyes and turned my back to him so I didn't have to see his pained face. It killed me.
"Roxanne. Listen to me. I'm done playing games. I love you. I did break up with Alisa but after I didn't hear from you I excepted the fact that you didn't want anything to do with me so I got her back. That was stupid because I realized you had no way of talking to me."

I looked over back at him after he said all that and as I was about to speak I get cut off by him.
"I know I hurt you. I'm just scared okay. I'm fucking scared. My feelings for you grew so fast. I thought it was lust where I just loved the way you look but no Roxanne. I love you. Every part of you. I'm just scared of it being too fast. Please believe me. I did officially break up with Alisa that day you came to Sammy's. That's why she was gone. I wanted to explain but you were wasted. Please look at me and tell me this isn't a waste of my time"

He was crying by now and I couldn't help but tear up. Seeing him like this hurt like hell. But I smiled at the thought of what just happened. My mom was right, it didn't matter how fast or slow it happened. If its love, its love.
"You make me forget other people exist Jack Gilinsky" I smiled and wrapped my arms around him. In that moment where I felt his arms around me, I knew I was in love.