ᴹʸ ˡᵒˢᵗ ˡᵒᵛᵉ*⁀➷수빈 ✔

{2}

Warning--- this part contains self-harm 

The wind murmurs like ghosts moving swiftly as night fell, the colour of deep blue tinted the sky in seconds. The sound of cars began to settle as everyone began to go home to their families or something I don't care. Knowing I shouldn't be out I was anyways studying for a test is for nerds well I say that...my dad does too, well only after he started drinking. I only left because the house is loaded with my dad's friends drinking again. I wouldn't be able to study even if I tried in that hell hole. I also cried from depression, so I desperately needed fresh air like a fish out of water, only having a few seconds to return if that makes sense. The day wasn't that interesting, Taehyung was absent, so I was thrilled, but the hate comments overflowed my mind during the 6 hours I was there in school. Well to me it was 5 hours and 30 minutes. I was late for school. I don't exactly know I will waste the remainder of my night. There is not much for me to do. It is a school night. Should I go home and research things to do when at night alone?.

The rest of my walk went pretty fast. I went around the park down the street. A section of it was me inventing about how I was going to waste the rest of my night. I shoved my hand into my hoodie pocket, moving my hand around hopefully getting the thing I wanted. Confident in what my hand clutched, I pulled it out, and I was right, it was my phone. I left a few seconds for my eyes to adjust to the light my screen provided, 9:59 pm. I decided the most beneficial thing for me to do was to return home and attempt to do something useful with my spare time, the street light flickered which caught my attention, and my gaze shifted immediately to it. Fear took over me as I strangely felt like someone was watching me like one of the scenes in a horror movie, I felt like I was being watched so within a second, I bolted home not taking the time to think maybe it was all in my head. When I arrived home and climbed through my bedroom window by the big oak tree, I thought maybe Soobin was watching me and that he has this whole time. I laid on my bed, staring at the white ceiling, my mind started imagining these weird things which turns out that it was a way to get me to sleep so suddenly. 

The next day began with me waking up at 6 am, which I didn't think I could do till now. I scrolled through Instagram for 1 hour before hearing my alarm screaming at me to wake up, since that is the time I usually start my school day.  I rolled out of my bed, lazily and went to the bathroom for a shower. The warm relaxing water slid down my face like raindrops during a thunderstorm. It took me 20 minutes to shower, which I learnt to realise I should be at school by 8 am, I dried my hair and my body and got into my clothes I planned last night before my walk. I wanted to look decently good for when Soobin returns.

I wasn't much of a fan of my outfit choice, but it's for Soobin, my love. I wanted to see him again, I want him back. His friends want him back to, they tell me how much they miss him some days. 

The leaves fall before my feet, I deliberately trod on the nut-brown leaf, hearing the pleasant crunch that accompanied my actions. I focused on my heels tapping on the stone pathway as I scanned the streets for Soobin once again. I gripped onto my bag straps and kept walking alone allowing my ears to focus on the sounds that surround me. "look it's the nerd." a voice I recognise too well spoke from behind me, which I widened my eyes in a matter of seconds turning around to face the owner of the deep voice. It was Kim Taehyung, he had his charcoal hair flipped into a perfect wave as his chocolate eyes pierced into my eyes that shimmered in the morning sunlight. Silence overtook us as my widened eyes stared into his, I was lost in his eyes when abruptly he punched my nose. The action caused me to step back, I bring my hand up to my nose to catch the drops of blood spilling out of my nose like waterfalls. he just walked off, left me there to bleed my nose out, I wasn't surprised he frequently did this since 7th Grade. I didn't deserve it nor did I need it but that doesn't matter to him, it became a routine.

I unlocked my front door and pulled the tissue out of my nose to stop the bleeding, the red liquid painted a part of the white tissue. My dad met me before I approached the stairs, he didn't give me any second to talk and shattered a bottle on my head and forced me up the stairs. Tears threatened to fall as I jogged up the rest of the stairs and ran as fast as a cheetah to my room and collapsed on my bed, I couldn't take it anymore. The front door slammed closed, indicating my dad left the house, I proceeded my way to the kitchen and grabbed a knife. I place the knife blade on my skin, I readjust my grip on the black handle of the shiny sharp object and cut myself. Red liquid drips off my pale skin, creating a red puddle on my cold white tiles. I took a deep breath and placed the knife on the marble counter, I fell to my knees, slamming the left side of my head against the cupboard. I sat there for a while, letting my wrist bleed out onto my plaid skirt and allowing it to drip onto the tiles beneath, Sleep took over me.

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Words: 1072

It's almost Halloween if you celebrate it, Happy Halloween to you. I don't know when I'm uploading a new part but it might be soon ^-^