Beautifully Flawed

"Give me a minute."

I wake up uneasy and breathing heavily. Immediately, I sit up covered in sweat, my hair an absolute mess.

Yes,i did put it in a top bun before going to bed.

It wasn't exactly a nightmare.....just a series of... sensations.

It felt like i was drowning, and then falling, suffocating and being stabbed all at once.

Picking up my phone, i check the time.

3am

.....i already hate today.

With a groan, i get out of bed and begrudgingly drag myself into the bathroom.

After taking a quick shower to wash off the sweat, i get dressed in my spandex shorts and long t-shirt.

I quietly make my way down the stairs, purposely avoiding those that creak- the last thing i want right now is to wake anyone up.

I slowly round the corner, heading for the kitchen, when a sound stops me dead in my tracks.

Listening carefully this time around, i'm able to make out what sounds like whimpering.

With a small sigh, i walk further into the kitchen and quickly fill a cup with water.

Sluggishly trudging down the corridor-still tired as hell might i add, i stop when i'm standing right in front of his door.

Quietly, i open the door and sneak in, making sure to shut the door behind me.

The sight of him sweating and writhing in his bed makes my heart ache for him.

I mean as annoying as he can be, he's still a good guy and a good friend, who doesn't deserve all the shit he's going through.

I place the glass of water on the nightstand and crawl into bed next to him. Pulling him closer, i simply wrap my arms around him in a hug.

After a few moments of him still writhing and whimpering incoherent things, i feel him stiffen as he obviously snaps back to reality,his heart beating erratically as he struggles to recover from whatever may have been happening to him......or his family. Seconds later, his shoulders are shaking as he tightens his grip on me.

Wordlessly, i move my face to the side to see him and the sight before me just hurts.

He looks so devastated as the tears keep streaming down his face.

"S-she...they were h-hurting-" he starts to explain but i cut him off.

"Shhh......dont worry about that now. I'm here okay? You have me and the guys, we'll get through this i promise. I need you to relax right now okay? We can talk about whatever happened later....but right now Jake, you need to rest." I say, rubbing soothing circles on his back as he continues to mumble incoherent things,his eyes not focusing on anything in particular.

It's difficult to see him this way, especially since i can relate to what exactly he's feeling right now.......

However, the thing is I have had this going on for a while- many years actually, although, it's so tiring and horrible to have to go through this regularly......in a weird fucked up way, i'm kind of used to it.

"Hey, drink this." I say softly, offering him the glass of water as he continues to clutch my shirt in a daze.

It takes me calling his name twice and eventually tapping him before he snaps out of it.

"Thanks" he says, his voice hoarse as he takes the cup.

He has the cup empty in a mere second. I return the cup to the nightstand as i turn to him.