Grounder | An Anya Love Story

29

Recap

A groan left my mouth as they kept talking kept arguing, why couldn't they shut up I was trying to die.

Why couldn't they let me die...

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Anya

The noise that left her sounded like heaven. Lexa and I shared a look before she yelled at the guards to go find Clarke. Its been a few days she said she would stay in Polis but she hasn't come back to see Maria yet today and just told me to keep an eye on her and let her know if anything has changed. Lexa stays in the room with us during the day but I, I haven't left this room since she has gotten here. 

Lexa and I watched as Maria brought her hand up to her face and over her eyes letting out a loud groan, before her other one went to try and sit her up. My hand reached out before I could stop it "What are you doing, you cant sit up until Clarke gets her and examines you." She just gave me this look before laying back down firmly but not before grabbing my hand.

We sat in silence for what felt like forever but what I know was only a few minutes before Clarke ran into the room. "Maria you're awake."

"Clarke" she chocked out "You are still as observant as a cactus." Her voice was hoarse and she had a stupid smile on her face but her eyes looked dead. 

Clarke let out a big sigh. "You're still an ass, good to know that hasn't changed." With that she moved her way over and lifted up her shirt to look at her wound. She poked and prodded at it for a few minutes every time she did I felt the hand tighten in mine. Once Clarke deemed it was good she pulled her shirt down "You look good. I would say start with small movements, defiently no fighting or training. But everything else seems fine. Lexa we need to go now." With that Clarke gave her one last smile before heading to the door.

"I am glad you're ok, we will talk about this when I get back from mount weather," with that Lexa put her hand on her shoulder before fallowing after Clarke. 

I could feel her eyes on me without looking at me. "I wanted to die, why couldn't you have just let me die." When I finally looked at her there was tears on her face. Grabbing her face in my hands softly I wiped the tears from her face before making eye contact.

"You are a great fighter and warrior you do not get to decide if and when you die, that will be decided by your adversary. You deserve to die like a warrior, and I intend to get you to that fight no matter how much you hate me for it." She didn't say anything back to me for awhile just put her head against my shoulder. Silence is never truly a bad thing just long. 

"I love you" it was so soft I could barley hear it. "But I don't want to be a warrior. I want to raise kids and have a farm. I spent so much time raising the nightblood children and they are mine. I know that isn't a life you want but that is the life I need. I am still a fighter and I will defend everything I love but that isn't my path. My path is raising and helping to nurture the next generation of warriors." She was crying I could hear it in her voice. I grabbed her hand tightly and brought it up to my lips for a quick kiss.

"If you know that is your path then you need to fallow it. You have my support and help my love." The sob broke free from her mouth. "You're a caring person but you are an avid fighter for what you love and if this is what you love you need to fight for it. I can't go live on the farm with you but we can have a beautiful life here in Polis and all of the children we can find."

"I want you to meet the nightblood children. They are wonderful Anya and I know I cant get attached to them because only one will survive, but they are all so wonderful and all would make great Commanders when Lexas end comes. I am very proud of them." The pride in her voice was very evident when she talked about them and I don't know when this was something that happened to her or when she found this pride for the children but she is talking about them like they are her own. 

"When you're feeling a little better we will go see the children alright my love?" She gave me a hum in response. I kisses her head and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "I love you and I don't know what I would do with myself without you in my life. I know that death inevitable but don;t let the stresses of the world get to you, fight for what you believe and for what you love until your last breath." 

"I am so sorry."