playlist ; im changkyun

33

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Changkyun, wake up. Your favourite show is starting soon" Jiyeon nudges him trying to wake Changkyun up.

Changkyun doesn't even budge. Jiyeon never thought of anything bad and gets up from her seat to bring some snacks from the kitchen.

But, even after coming back from the kitchen, Changkyun didn't wake up. It's been 10 minutes.

"Changkyun-ah, hurry and wake up! You will miss the showwwww" Jiyeon pouts,  shaking his body a little too hard.

She notices something. Changkyun's body is quite cold and his body...is lifeless.

Jiyeon starts to cry. "Stop! This is not funny! Whatever you're playing right now is not funny! Changkyun wake up!" Her tears start to flow out like a river.

Her vision is blurred by tears. She reach out her phone in her sweatpants pocket and dial Shownu's number.

"Oppa, Changkyun. Changkyun's body is cold. Please come here. I'm scared. Please Please"

"Alright. Please calm down and wait for us. Don't do anything stupid please stay put Jiyeon," And with that, Shownu, the other members of Monsta X and their manager rushed to their place.

"Fuck, this can't be happening. Please tell me this isn't true," Kihyun cusses out.

"We need to send his body to the hospital for postmortem. We need to know what was wrong," Manager is trying to sort things out calmly, eventhough he also can't bear to see Changkyun's lifeless body in front of him right now.

They are sad. They didn't know about Changkyun's illness. They're blaming themselves. They fall down one by one. In front of the maknae's lifeless body on the couch, waiting for the ambulance to take him.

Ambulance sirens can be heard, they are still crying on the floor. The hospital team quickly take Changkyun's body and drive to the hospital. The ambulance later is followed by Monsta X's cars with Jiyeon on it too. They're quite during the car ride. The atmosphere is filled by sadness and darkness by the sudden death of their maknae. Their member, their brother, their family and Jiyeon's other half.

"I've guessed it. He had stage 4 lung cancer. He can't live long, and he knew about it 3 months ago. I'm so sorry for your loss. You can go inside and see him for the last time. Excuse me." Doctor Kim said, excuse-ing himself.

"Changkyun-ah. What is this? Why are you leaving us so soon?" Hyungwon said, while sobbing and reach out to hold Changkyun's cold fingers.

"Please, this isn't true. This is a dream, right? Slap me hyung, please tell me this isn't true!" Minhyuk is raging out his feelings with Wonho hugging him.

"This is true, Minhyuk-ah. Our maknae left us. He was sick, our maknae was sick." Wonho whispers in Minhyuk's ear trying to comfort him, denying the reality that is hitting them right now.

"Kyun-ah. I miss you already. I'm sorry we didn't know. I'm sorry, Kyun-ah. I love you so much" Jooheon said, while caressing the maknae's hair. He shuts his eyes close trying to regain the memories that he spent with Changkyun. He can't seem to accept the reality either.

Truthfully, no one could.

"Baby, you did great. Thank you for fighting and being strong until your last breath. Thank you for all the love and memories you gave me. I'm sorry I can't save you. I really love you, Kyun. I really do. Wait for me, okay? We will meet you there, soon. Be happy there too." Jiyeon sadly said, while looking at Changkyun's lifeless body, staying a few metres apart from him. She want to kiss him so bad but she know she can't anymore. Instead, she leaned in and kissed his cold forehead.

"Changkyun-ah, I love you so much. So so much. Please be happy up there too. Please wait for us." Shownu said, in a slow voice. Trying to avoid looking at Changkyun's face. He can't control his tears.

"He will wait for us, right? He love us, right? Please," Kihyun can't seem to finish his line, and wrap his arms around Hyungwon, giving comfort to each other.

"He love us. He really do. He will wait for us. We will be with him soon, Kihyun-ah. We will, don't worry." Hyungwon pats Kihyun's head.

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"I know we are really sad about the news. But I.M would never want us to be sad and risking our health because of him. He was a great artist, his kindness towards other people, he was a nice person inside and out. I wouldn't trade him for anything. With his kindness and beautiful heart in mind, let's all wish him our last goodbye." The CEO of Starship said his speech.

The members of Monsta X can't stop crying. Changkyun is smiling brightly in the photography. He is smiling, as if he is still there. They can hear his laughter. They can feel a sudden rush of warmness, as if Changkyun is there, hugging them all at once.

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Jiyeon arrives at their place. This house will be always be their's. She won't erase anything. Not even the slightest ones. Changkyun will always be at this place with her.

She is tired from crying all day. She really is tired. But everywhere she looks, there will be always Changkyun. The whole house is haunted by Changkyun's laugh and smiles. She doesn't want to forget all the memories that place holds. She stand up and caress every single nook of the house. She wanted to feel Changkyun's presence once again.

She goes to the kitchen, an image came to her mind. Changkyun was hugging her back, while she was cooking his favourite food. Changkyun was embracing her with love.

She goes to the bedroom, where she and Changkyun slept together. An image appeared, Changkyun was singing lullaby and patting her back while she was laying on his chest after a nightmare. She missed his voice.

She then goes to the living room. Where Changkyun and her spent almost of their time watching Netflix and cuddling in one blanket. She smile to herself, remembering how Changkyun always fight her to pick his favourite movie. She missed his cuteness.

She then goes back to the sofa, where the last image of Changkyun appear. His lifeless body. She caresses the sofa, Changkyun's warmth is still there. She place her head on the sofa, and fell asleep from tiredness.

-

It is already night time. They spent their day zoning out and they drank alcohol till night. They are so tired, they are numb by now. The tears won't come out.

Kihyun sets up the living room for them to sleep together tonight. Minhyuk brought Changkyun's pillow out. Shownu looks at him with a confused look. He doesn't care, he want to feel Changkyun's presence with him tonight. He want to hug Changkyun's pillow and feel his scent.

Shownu stand up and goes to Changkyun and Minhyuk shared room. He grabbed Changkyun's blanket. It smells like him, calming and warm.

Kihyun can't lose either. He nudges Hyungwon and Wonho to come with him. They go through Changkyun's closet and wear Changkyun's hoodies one each.

Now the living room smell like Changkyun. As if Changkyun is there, as if they're all hugging him. Sleep well, Changkyun. They wished for the last time until six of them fall into deep sleep.