Goblin Slayer x Reader One Shots

{breakthrough}

guys. i'm back.

sort of

i really have no clue but this came to me in the shower the other night and now i have no choice but to write it

"God, it's so cold I can feel my ears frosting over," cried Elf Archer as she rubbed at the tips of her pink ears.

I snickered at the distressed girl from the guild table. "Maybe you should get ear muffs... if they can fit," I laughed out. The elf clenched her fists at me, sending a flood of threats my way. "Honestly, why don't you try being in my shoes? It's been a rough two-thousand years, you know!" I ignored her and continued to sip at my hot cocoa.

"Jeez, someone throw another log in the fire! I'm freezing over here," I heard a particular redhead shout. "It has been very cold, as of late," Lizard Priest shivered with his claws hooked tightly around his arms. "If spring doesn't come soon, I think my toes might freeze off," I sighed.

"The only one who hasn't been bothered by this is Orcbolg. Like what's with that guy? He's like some sort of machine!"

"Maybe he just doesn't like to complain like the rest of us," I noted. "Or maybe he really is a machine."
Priestess was the next unlucky soul to join us. "H-hello, everyone," she greeted with jittery teeth. "Your cloak is so thin! I'm surprised you're not already frozen stuff," I exclaimed.

"Yeah... my last one is still bloody from our last quest. Hold on, I'll be right back!" The blonde immediately left us to go bask in front of the fireplace. Lastly, it was Goblin Slayer's turn to enter the Guild Hall. And he was covered head to toe in snow!

"What happened to you? You look like a snowman," our skinny archer teased. "Scouting," was all that he replied. "Again? Is this the third time this week?" I asked. "With the snow being so thick, it's a much harder task. I've barely made any progress so far." With that, the man took a seat at the long table.

"Think you need extra help?" Dwarf Shaman questioned while refilling his drink. "Perhaps. Any of you want to join me, tomorrow?" They all grew stiff at his words. "No way, I hate the snow." Elf Archer was out. "I apologize, Sir Goblin Slayer, but my kind are incredibly sensitive to cold weather." No one was fond of the idea of treading out into the frigid outdoors. "What about you, Y/n?" My heart ran on a marathon as soon as my name was mentioned.

Even though I hated winter as much as the next guy, wasting such an opportunity to spend time with Goblin Slayer was ludicrous. "Sure, I'd be happy to go," I blurted out instantly. "Good. We'll head out in the morning and setup camp for the night." We were going camping?! The mere thought of being only in his presence caused my face to brim with red. "O-ok. I'll make sure to pack up my gear."

Once he was finally out of range, I could feel the taunting stare of my female companion. "Looks like our little Y/n is gonna spend the night with her man~." I whacked her in the shoulder in utter embarrassment and hissed, "I'll tear you apart and feed you to the wolves!" However, she didn't take me seriously in the slightest.

That night, I couldn't sleep a wink. I knew internally that there really wasn't much to be excited about. I'd have to spend an entire day out in the dangerous, freezing wilderness and have to sleep in it, too. But then I began to think about the company I'd have. Goblin Slayer was a painfully curt and dense man when it came to practically anything normal related. In more simplistic terms, he was obsessed; so obsessed to the point where he was willing to sacrifice a day full of warmth. But in the end, I supposed I had to be obsessed right with him.

My eyelids became heavy as I was trapped in my thoughts, and I dozed peacefully through the remainder of my night.

When morning came, well, when it was about to come, I was already up and about. The sun hadn't even risen over the mountains quite yet, but it didn't matter to me. My only two options were to restlessly lie in bed for another two hours, or get up and eagerly start the day.