Short Stories & Poetry

Fake (NaNo Day 8)

Laughter
bubbling from my throat
in joy-filled masses.
Smiles plastered
across my face
Fake.

My brain tells me
I am happy;
happier than I've
been in a long while.
But my heart,
it tells me otherwise.

I'm hurting
it hurts
I'm alone
I'm surrounded
leave me alone
but please don't leave me.

Filled with
love
for all of you
but
can't let it show
so easily.

Tell me I
can't be sad
'cause won't you just
look at that smile.
But where's the sparkle
of the eyes?

Gone,
that's where.

Palpitating heart,
irregular rhythm
I'm talking to
real people
oh lord
help me.

Teetering
on the edge
of a deep
precipice
nothing
quite like this
feeling.

Feelings
in my gut
don't know
which to trust
call me confused
and I can agree
hyperactivity
sending me insane.

Dark clouds
gathered inside
behind a veil
happiness the disguise
not real, not true
but hard to get past
the aching is there
emotions so vast.

Can't face it
tactics faded
don't 'member
how to cope.
Guess I'll just
surf this slope
until I hit
rock bottom

And start again.