BTS Imagines ✨

Loss // JM

"I don't want to lose you as a friend."

My tears fell as I heard those words from his mouth.

After all, I am just a friend.

I walked home feeling the cold breeze and my tears kissing my cheeks. I did not mind the breeze making me feel cold. After all, I am used to the coldness he gave me the moment I confessed my feelings for him.

Funny. It's all my fault. I remember him telling me he is not still ready for a relationship, but here I was. Getting my hopes up and making myself believe that I can change his heart. Making myself believe that I can make him take the risk again because I can. I was ready to risk it all to make him believe in love again.

Fool. I am a fool and I know it, my friends know it, everybody did. I remember my friends telling me to stop it, but I was too stubborn. I was blinded by my will to change him. I was blinded by my love for him.

Scared. He told me he was scared to try again; he's scared to get his heart broken again. But little did he know, I am terrified of my own feelings too. I am afraid that if I love him too much, I would lose myself again. The moment I realized my feelings, I was in denial. I did not want this to happen but damn it. Why did you care so much for me? Made me feel loved, and it was not just as a friend. The walls I built? You made your way through them.

Lonely. Now I feel lonely. I feel like no one will ever be there for me. My friends are there, but I don't want to bother them with my foolishness. I have no one to hold onto right now. I have no hope. And now, I lost my belief in love.

Love. Love is nothing but a word. A word full of lies. It is not true, it does not happen, it is all just a fantasy. Love is just a word that messes people up. Love is the only reason why people are left broken. Love is like an unwanted file that is needed to be deleted.

Never fall in love again.

To the guy who broke my heart, thank you. Thank you for opening my eyes. Thank you for making me realize that love is like tears in the rain; it means nothing. Thank you for making me realize that love is unreal. You won't lose me as a friend, Park Jimin, but I am sure that you have made me lose my heart.