Love In The Absence (Together Series #1)

12

I woke up but I feel lifeless. My body wasn't able too move and all I can do is to cry. I know that my Dad is stable now but knowing that I lost a life inside my womb...devastated me.

I don't know what to feel. I don't know what should I act. I don't know what to say. I don't know who to hold for me to release all my agony and mourns.

And all I can feel is my heart continue to shattered in to tiny pieces. What just happened was torturing me again and again but the news broke me this morning was end of the world for me.... All I want is to shut down my world and don't wake up anymore.

Thorn didn't even show himself up nor visiting me if I'm alright. Or just check me if I'm alive and kicking... It's heart wrenching and all I can do is to cry and cry until all my tears are gone and I can't cry anymore.

Hindi ko alam na buntis ako. Hindi ko alam na may munting buhay na pala sa loob ng sinapupunan ko. The accident made it accomplish to killed my baby's life. All I want is to cry and to feel sorry for Thorn but he's not here in my side. What just happened?

Alam ba niyang nawala ang bata sa sinapupunan ko? Alam na ba niyang buntis ako? Alam ba niyang sobrang nasasaktan ako ngayon? Alam ba niyang kailangan ko siya? Alam ba niyang nagdurusa ako at nagluluksa para sa anak namin? Alam ba niya? Alam ba niya?  Sobrang dami kong tanong!

Bakit wala siya sa tabi ko?

Isa siya sa lakas ko pero bakit?

Its just a blink of an eye and everything is out of place. I was happy talking to my father... I was happy that day... I was happy talking to him.... We're fine! we're fucking damn fine! Where is he? May nangyari ba sakanya habang papunta siya samin? I tried to call him but he's not answering. I'm sending him messages but he's not replying. Anong nangyari! Kailangan kong malaman kung nasaan siya... Kailangan kong malaman kung okay siya... Kailangan niyang malaman na nawala ang baby namin... Kailangan ko siya... Kailangan na kailangan ko siya! Dahil hinang-hinang ako!

Kailangan ko siya. Kailangan ko siya dahil hindi ko kayang mawala rin siya sakin!

"Sis kumain ka naman oh, please? Tama na. Madi-dehydrate ka niyan eh..." Si Chel.

She tried to speak avoiding her tears to fall but she didn't succeed when I start to cry again.

Ilang araw na siyang nasa tabi ko. Pinipilit na kumain pero hindi ko lang siya pinapansin. Wala akong ganang kumain. Wala akong ganang makipag-usap. All I want is to be alone. Grieve for the loss of my baby and think why Thorn didn't even visit me since I'm in the hospital three weeks ago.

Hindi ko man paniwalaan ang tumatakbo sa isip ko pero alam kong may nangyaring masama pero wala akong matanungan. Wala akong matanungan ng patungkol sakanya. Benj is not answering my calls and each day that I don't see him, it scares me. Mas lalo akong natatakot na katotohanan na may nangyari nga sakanya. I always tried to reach to him by calling his number but no one is answering. It keeps on ringing and became busy.

Until one gloomy morning when Benj answered her phone. Happiness starts to build up and only  subside slowly. She doesn't know where her brother is and I don't believe it. It's impossible that she doesn't know where her brother is. Diba? Kapatid niya iyon at imposibleng wala siyang alam kung anong nangyari sa kapatid niya. I tried and tried until she visited me.