Infinity

The morning after the night before

I pull the blanket back up as it falls slightly down my shoulder, i shiver in the cold so I pick up the coffee that is next to me, i breathe in the comforting smell and wrap my hands around it - taking in the warmth. I bring the mug up to my lips and sip gently at the hazel liquid, i feel it warm all the way down to my stomach. The figure in my bed groans and rolls over, i smile while watching them... they are going to regret their decisions from the night before. I look out onto the abandoned London street below and watch the pigeons bathing in the puddles just below the pavement. I sigh. I've been sat here for at least two hours looking out into the street and seeing the sunrise. I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about the conversation with Louis the night before. I keep typing out a message on my phone to him and just before I click send i change my mind. No one else is awake - everyone partied pretty hard last night, except for me. The figure in the bed rolls over once more, this time towards me and the break of light from the open curtains touches his face. Harry looks godlike while sleeping - I've always said it. Lana, Niall and Liam all stayed the night because they thought it was a good idea to carry on the celebrations even after the club closed. Harry offered his bed to the new parents and Liam happily took, well passed out on, the sofa. Harry, always the gentleman offered to sleep on the floor but I told him not to be so stupid and get in next to me. It felt nice to have someone next to me and it made me think that if i can't be with someone who i love maybe i can make someone happy who loves me. Harry stirs once more and i watch him again, his eyes slowly open and he frowns at the light coming in through the curtain, he groans. With one eye open he looks at me sat in the window, i smile, "P?" He blinks both eyes then yawns, "What time is it?" He closes his eyes again due to the light and i smile as i look down at my phone to check the time,
"It's just gone eight thirty." He groans again and pulls the duvet up over his face, from under the duvet i just make out him saying, "I feel like I'm dying." I laugh and jump down from the window, i place my mug on the window seat carefully and then jump onto the bed next to him. I climb under the duvet with him and he smiles at me, "You will have no sympathy from me Harold, this is self inflicted." He laughs and so do I. We both stop laughing at the same time and i look into his green eyes, they sparkle, even though they are slightly glazed over by the hangover. He moves closer to me, i know what he's about to do and i move away quickly, "I'm sorry." I say seeing how hurt he is. I put my hands over my face, "I'm sorry. I'm just not... not... ready."
"I shouldn't have." He says shaking his head and throwing the duvet off of our heads, "Sorry. Plus i probably smell like a pub right now." He smirks.
"No, you don't!" I say playfully nudging him. He brings his arms up over the top of the duvet and extends one out so that i can snuggle into his side, i happily oblige. I place my head basically on his 17 black tattoo, he moves his arm around the side of me and i can feel his calmness wash over me. "How you feeling?" He whispers just above my head.
"I'm fine." I say as i snuggle myself into him more.
"I'm fine." He mimics me but in a higher pitch voice, i push off of his chest and open my mouth in shock, "Do you know who say that they're fine like that? People who are not fine!" I sigh, "So tell me, P, how you actually feel."
I bury my head into his side more then speak softly, "Like my heart has been pulled out and run over." I feel the tears sting behind my eyes. Harry pulls me closer to him, "It will be okay. I promise."

"Have you got any aspirin?" Lana asks opening the third cupboard in the kitchen - I'm sat on a stool at the island, I'm meant to be doing work as I've got paper thrown in all directions in front of me but I've stopped to watch her. She's wearing sunglasses and looks very pale. "I think that you need more than aspirin." I say chuckling. She turns around and pulls her sunglasses down to give me a death stare, i roll my eyes, "I think they are in the drawer to your right. This isn't my house don't forget." She pulls the drawer open and finds the tablets she pops two into a glass of water and it fizzes on contact, she places it on the island and sits on the stool next to me, she sips the mixture and makes a funny face. I laugh as i cross out some things on the script in front of me, "It might as well be." Lana says breaking the silence, i look up at her and see her looking around the room. "Sorry?" I say confused.
"It might as well be your house." I frown still confused, "Is this whole kitchen not your design? And don't think that i don't remember you showing me the fireplace and nook drawings either. Even his bedroom is what you wanted." She shrugs.
"We designed it together Lana." I say sighing. Trying to focus on the scripts in front of me.
"Do you not think its weird?" She shivers slightly and takes another sip of the aspirin water, "It's like he's still in love with you or something!" I look up now to stare at her, raising one eyebrow. "Oh." She says taking a gulp of her water.
"Don't act like you didn't know." I roll my eyes.
"I had my suspicions but he's told you directly?" She asks.
"No but when we kissed the 2nd time and then he tried again for a 3rd time this morning i kinda of figured it out." I sigh, "I could love him again right? Like i did before? More than Louis?"
"You kissed again?" I roll my eyes, of course out of all that Lana picks up on the one thing I didn't tell her when it happened.
"Yeah, I stopped it quickly and we got no where near to touching lips this morning."
"P, i love you, you know that but you really need to sort your shit out. You're in love with Louis yet you're talking about possibly loving his best friend... its not fair to keep going back and forth between them." I sigh and slam my pen down on the table with anger.
"I'm not going back and forth between them. Louis doesn't want me. He doesn't want me Lana! I'm going to have to come to terms with that and if i have a slight chance of happiness with Harry wouldn't you want me to take it?" I frown at her and she looks like she's contemplating everything. "Of course i want you to be happy but its not fair to Harry if he..."
"If Harry what?" Harry has walked into the kitchen and i give Lana a look so she doesn't say anything. She stares back at me and Harry's eyes narrow at her. "If Harry is awake..." she begins but Harry isn't convinced, "We were wondering if you were up. I need to go take this to Niall so see you later." She jumps off of the stool and pretty much runs out the door. Harry smirks at me then thumbs at the door.
"What was that all about?" He asks.
"Nothing. Just Lana being Lana." I shrug and Harry pulls a face. He walks behind me and clicks the kettle on automatically getting out two mugs, i smile to myself as he makes me a cup of tea also, he hands it to me and then leans on the counter taking a sip of his, "You got a lot of work to do?" He enquires looking at the table of papers and motioning with his mug.
"Yeah. I've got to edit these scripts, write two more and then have a staff meeting at 5pm. Working 5,000 miles away from your actual workplace is quite a challenge." I take a sip of my tea and then stretch.
"I know you're looking at places here but have you not considered moving back to LA?" I stop mid stretch and drop my arms to stare at him and when i open my mouth to speak the door flies open. "Louis is in!" Liam shouts excitedly. Harry is holding his mug in front of his face paused in shock before taking a sip. I look at him raising my eyebrow and he shakes his head unknown of what is going on. "What are you on about?" I ask then take in Liams appearance. He is still wearing last nights clothes, minus his suit jacket and his hair is pointing in all different directions. I'm also pretty sure that there is a drool trail going down the side of his mouth. He shakes his head, "Sorry! The reunion! Louis says he's in!" Every part of my body freezes and I clench my butt. The three of them were talking about a reunion last night but i didn't think they would actually go through with it. "Wow, he did?!" Harry puts his mug down clearly excited, "This is actually happening?"
"Unless you and Paige are going to get married can i ask you to lower your voice?" Niall has now entered the fray, he looks very green and is holding his stomach - he is also wearing one of Harry's dressing gowns. Lana follows in closely behind him. "But lets not open up that can of worms." He starts pouring himself some tea then looks at me and winks - i poke my tongue out at him.
"No. Louis has agreed to the reunion!" Liam is pretty much jumping for joy. Niall, who had managed to pour himself a couple of tea is now frozen in the same pose that Harry was some moments ago then puts his mug back down slowly. "You're joking!" He looks from me to Lana who is pretty much jumping for joy just like Liam is - a true directioner at heart. "Look, you guys know my terms so as long as we can all agree to them I'm good to go!" Harry says grinning.
"I'm all for it!" Niall says giving me a wink.
"Yeah, I've agreed to it too." Liam says then adds, "So has Louis... reluctantly." Liam smiles in my direction.
"Pack your bags P, we're going back on tour!" Niall raises his hands in the air then slowly lowers them when he sees my face.
"What? I'm not part of the band... i don't need to go on tour." I say confused.
"Well it was part of my terms. If i go... you go. We can work on your music and you can be our warm up act." Harry tries to convince me and i motion to the papers in front of me, "I'm not a singer I've got a job." Harry shrugs.
"A job that you already work 5000 miles away from." I watch Niall slowly walk out followed by Lana.
"Which is still my job H. I can't just stop."
"We will sing in the evenings, you would have the day free."
"What about rehearsals?"
"Well work around them." He suggests which makes me laugh. Liam has now left the room.
"Also have you not thought about how hard it would be me seeing Louis everyday?"
"You're making excuses now - it will be harder for him! He's the one that's lost you."
"I can't even sing."
"You're on the most watched of YouTube today. You can sing - you're amazing." He is sat next to me now and his emerald eyes are sparkling at me. "H, that doesn't matter and it didn't exactly go to plan did it. I wrote and sung a song... I'm done." I sigh heavily and he leans forward now we are almost nose to nose. My heart beats fast - I'm sure my reaction to him would never change. "Well you will be the one responsible for millions of broken hearted directioners all around the world." He smirks and scrunchies his nose, "Because Miss Sanderson, beautiful Miss Sanderson," I blush slightly, then he lowers his voice, "If you don't go I'm not going." Then he kisses the tip of my nose and walks out of the kitchen. "Eugh!" I rest my head on top of all my papers on the table. I push away from it and jump off my stool, I switch the kettle on for another cup of tea then start thinking about the proposal from Harry - For the first time in 10 years One Direction could be together and performing again... i am not going to be the person that stops that from happening. I slam my mug down, storm towards the door and pull it open angrily, "Where's Harold?" I demand of Liam who is currently sat in the nook on the office chair. He is startled at my sudden appearance and demanding tone, "Upstairs!" He shouts back automatic response to my tone of voice. I nod and make my way up the stairs towards my bedroom. I purposely stomp up the stairs so Harry can hear me coming and when i walk into my room he's sat up in my bed watching tv... smirking. He looks at me - his green eyes twinkling and i jump on top of him. "Listen to me Mr Harold Styles... I am not going to be the one responsible for One Direction not going on a fucking reunion tour,' I'm wagging my finger in his face and I've got my knees either side of his legs - almost on all fours, "So here's what's going to happen. I'm going to come on the stupid tour with you guys and possibly sing," Harry goes to open his mouth to speak but i shoot him such an evil look he quickly closes it, folds his arms across his lap and then motions his head for me continue, "But if at any point you annoy me or Louis makes even the slightest complaint about my presence then i am coming straight home. Do you understand me Mr TPWK? You little blackmailing shite?" I now sit back onto my knees and fold my arms across my chest. Harry chuckles but it quickly turns into a smirk, "Well Miss Sanderson you've got yourself a deal." I roll my eyes and huff, "Don't be so stressy!" He starts moving his legs up and down so i bounce slightly, "Come on Mrs Grumpy guts... we get to be on tour again!" I'm still sat with my arms crossed annoyed that i got talked into this. When i move slight he quickly brings his legs up which knocks me down to him, we are face to face, "How do you not love tour?" He asks and i shrug, "It's where i fell in love with you." His green eyes burn into mine searching through them and for a second nothing else matters but then my stomach flips, "Yeah well don't get any ideas H... that is not happening this time. I've got enough drama in my life thanks." I laugh and push myself off of him. He looks disappointed so i hold my hand out at him, "Come on then, lets go tell the boys." His smile touches his eyes and his dimple appears - I can't help but smile back. He jumps off the bed and takes my hand i lead him out of the room and down the stairs. Liam is on the sofa now along with Niall, still looking green, and Lana who looks just as bad. "Good you're all here." They all look up at me, "H - wanna tell them?"
"Well P and i have discussed it and well..." he pauses for dramatic effect, "We're going on tour!"