Infinity

In love with love

The fire has dimmed now, it's embers still glowing in the bottom of pit but no more giant flames to stare into. The dark has engulfed us with only the fire, the fairy lights hanging in the trees and the light spilling out onto the patio from the house is all we are using to be able to see each other. Niall and Lana are cuddled up together on a chair next to me, we have thin blankets draped over us as even though its still warm there is a soft cooler breeze every now and again. Louis is on the other side of me and looking at me every so often. I think he still feels anger towards me at the rejection earlier. "Do you know what i really love?" Lana breaks the silence. I take a sip of my cocktail and look at her.
"Love." She declares, "I just really love, love." I chuckle.
"You love love?" I ask with my eyebrow raised.
"Yes, the love i felt from holding josh the first time, the love when i married Niall and the love around this fire right now. I just love it."
"Sometimes it hurts though." I mumble and Louis looks at me.
"Yeah, it does but then you know its real." Lana informs me, "Liam have you ever been in love?"
"Of course - Maya. I can't wait for her to get here tomorrow." Liam responds and Lana chuckles drunkenly.
"I completely forgot that you got engaged." She chuckles again then hiccups. She turns to Louis, "What about you Louis?" I side eye Louis, wondering what his answer would be. He breathes out heavily. "Nah." He says slowly, "Love is only for the brave and i ain't brave." Anger rises in me and i get up out of my seat quickly then storm into the house. I go to the kitchen and reach straight for the tequila that is sat on the side. I pour myself a shot as i hear someone walk in. "You alright?" I look up into Louis blue eyes full of concern. I shot back the tequila that i had poured, "Yeah, just peachy." I say sarcastically. He raises his eyebrows at me, "You know what." I blurt out anger in my belly and not quite sure what I'm going to say next, "You win. I can't do this anymore, i just can't. I can't keep going back and forth in whatever game this is between us. I can't put my life on hold anymore. I can't hurt H anymore, i can't hurt myself anymore. I'm done." I can feel the tears falling down my cheeks. Louis has his hands palm to palm but his finger tips are resting on his chin, he's nodding. "Okay." He says after what sounds like an eternity. I frown at him and he turns around to walk back outside to our friends. My heart begins to ache and more tears slowly fall down my face but then he turns around quickly, "But what if I'm not done? Because no matter how many times i try to tell meself to leave it - i can't help but fall again. Like when you were seeing Harry, so many times i wanted to just hit him away from you. That day you came back and I saw you for the first time in 6 months i might as well had died. You broke my heart with how well you looked being away from me that whole time. That's why i stayed with Eliza." My mouth is hanging open in shock, "But then when i kept seeing you and you sang that god damn song." He shakes his head at me then steps towards me. My belly comes alive with butterflies, "I knew that this wasn't finished because its never really going to be over is it?" He brings his hand to my face and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, he rests his palm on my cheek and wipes away the tears with his finger tips, I swear to god I've stopped breathing, "One more confession while I'm doing so well." He says bending down slightly so that he's face to face with me, "I lied to Lana just now." My heart is beating out of my chest, my stomach is alive with butterflies and i feel dizzy from holding my breath, "I love you." Then his lips were on mine and the rest of the world fades away from my view, its just me and him stuck in this moment, everything that I've actually wanted and needed happening right now. Everything in the world was righted, everything seemed perfect. This was it, my happy ever after, finally! We break apart, "Wow." He says, "Shame you don't love me back." He shrugs and turns around to walk away, i grab his hand and pull him back to me, he's smirking, "Of course i love you Lou!" And I kiss him once more.
"Fucking fin-al-ly!" We jump apart as i hear Lana's voice, "Only took you a million years." Louis and i both laugh and he puts his arm around my shoulders, i wrap my arm around his waist to face Lana. "It kinda of just happened...". I start to explain.
"Yeah." Louis agrees while looking down at me smiling, i look up at his gorgeous sky blue eyes and feel like a giddy schoolgirl. He bends down and kisses me gently. "Alright, alright. I get it!" Lana says, "Gees, get a room." She rolls her eyes but is still smiling.
"Actually, we have one." I say playfully hitting Lou on the chest, he looks into my eyes and smiles.
"Yeah, night Lana." Louis says quickly as he grabs my hand and we run upstairs.