Your UnSlut Project

Submitted by @sarah2639

Religion has always been important to my family. Growing up as a Mormon really warped my views on the world, society, and specifically women. My whole life I've been told that the men are to work and provide for the family while the women are to sit at home and take care of multiple children. There really wasn't much of a choice if you wanted to be accepted in the community. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with that. If that's what you want to do, then go ahead. The fact that there's no other option is what made me think.

Another thing I was taught while growing up was the idea of modesty and its correlation with chastity. Skirts and shorts must reach the knee, never show your shoulders, and don't you even give any indication you have breasts. It was almost programmed into me that if a girl dressed a little more revealing than I was, then I was to pity her because she obviously had no self-respect. If a girl was to dress provocatively, then obviously she was an attention-seeking whore. She just wanted the attention of the boys. She wanted to tempt them because she was selfish. If she got raped or assaulted then it was totally her fault because she tempted the boys, they can't control themselves, boys will be boys. Unfortunately, for many years I thought this way, seeing no fault in it. However now I see the flaws.

Many Mormons shun those who are a part of the LGBT community. There are people sent to conversion therapy or kicked out of their home because of their sexuality. They are shunned because of something they can't control. If you come out to your Mormon family, you generally can't expect positive reactions. To be fair, there have been some families that are accepting.

Basically, growing up with these beliefs being shoved in your face week after week is super efficient in shaping your worldview. We were all like sheep, no one had different opinions. We just believed what we were told and that was that.

However, as I got older I began to research more about these issues. My faith was being questioned. I realized that maybe I didn't agree with everyone. In the ninth grade I befriended two girls who ended up dating, introducing me to my first real look at homosexuality. I was really close to these girls, however I was told homosexuals were sinners and not people I should surround myself with. Except they were super nice and honest and had many of the same values as me. What really made me think was the fact that they are both Christian. Why does being gay mean you're bad? After seeing them upset and cry about the problems they faced, and the friends they lost from being gay, I realized it wasn't a choice. They could not help it, it was just how they were born. It was not a sin.

A while later I heard about a story about a girl who was raped. Due to the fact she had been wearing revealing clothes the blame was thrust upon her. It was the not the guy's fault, he was just reacting to his natural instincts. The girl was at fault for being such a slut. However that event made me think. Why do women have to hide our bodies just so we won't get raped? Why is it our fault a guy decided he wouldn't take no for an answer? Why is it our fault that a guy forced himself on a girl while she made it clear she meant no? It's really quite absurd when you think about it.

It was then when I realized that these beliefs I grew up with were cruel. There's nothing wrong with being gay or lesbian or transgender, or asexual, or any other sexuality. It was just how you were born and there was no changing it. I realized that it was okay to wear what you want, whether it's a bikini or sweats. If you're comfortable then go straight ahead. What you wear does not define your worth. I realized that having sex is totally okay, and if you want to sleep with lots of people it's okay and if you want to wait until marriage it's okay as well. Sex is an individual's decision and you have to do what's right for you. An individual's sexuality, clothing, and sexual activity does not define their worth. How an individual acts and treats others is what's more important. If you judge someone for having sex or dressing "slutty", think twice. Because there's nothing wrong with that. Isn't sex a natural thing? Why do we hate others for engaging in a natural activity? Stop shaming others for having sex. There's no such thing as a slut.