PAINFULLY FALLING [BOOK 1]

Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

Violet

I decided not to tell Lemuel about what I saw three days ago. Hindi dahil natatakot akong totoo ang aking nakita kun'di dahil alam kong mahihirapan lamang siyang paniwalaan ito. Hindi ko siya masisisi. It was raining cats and dogs that night and there was no one to support my statement. Isa pa, Lemuel is somehow a non-believer. Though he never confirmed it, makikita naman sa kung paano siyang hindi interesado sa mga usapin tungkol sa relihiyon. Ni hindi ko pa nga siya nakitang pumunta ng simbahan o sumamba sa mga santo gaya ng iba. Hindi rin ako naglakas-loob na tanungin kung ano ba talaga ang pinaniniwalaan niya.

Talks about religions often lead to debates. It's saddening to know that some people cannot respect others' beliefs. Tila ba ang debate ang sukatan ng iba ng kanilang pananalig.

I remembered mom's words. Just because you think what you believe in is true doesn't mean everything that contradict to it is already wrong.

My mom was a believer of God but she never took me to any church. I sometimes question the rationale of it but I guess I will have to find out the reason on my own like it is a big mystery game I have to unfold myself.

I scanned the last shelf containing the references for Political Science classes. The eighty square meters main library is often empty during the last school hours, giving the place a calming yet eerie vibe. The forest green paint of the walls and ceiling matched the wooden floor that's regulary waxed by student assistants working in the library. The main reading area near the librarian's cubicle is well-lit while the rest of the areas have antique mini chandeliers and medieval-type wall lamps. The sanctuary for the solitude-addicts I must say.

I tried to walk as quietly as I could but my every step echoes. I suddenly hated wearing my pirate boots today. Sinisira ng ingay nito ang katahimikan ng lugar.

May dalawang malaking aklat na ng constitution akong yakap ngunit kailangan ko ng isa pa. Tiningala ko ang itaas na bahagi ng shelf. The book I was looking for is on the top most shelf and I won't be able to reach it without a ladder because I'm short. Sa huli ay nagdesisyon akong ibaba ang bag at mga libro saka ako tumalon upang abutin ang aklat.

Wrong move! What I did create a loud tud on the floor. Sandali akong huminto at nakiramdam kung may sisita ba sa ginawa ko.

A few seconds passed and I didn't hear the librarian's stilleto coming. Sinilip ko siya sa gilid shelf at nakitang nasa telepono ang kanyang atensyon habang hindi maganda ang timpla ng ekspresyong nakaguhit sa kanyang mukha.

Looks like the old maiden is having a bad day.

I decided to try to reach the book again but before I could even execute my silly jump, a familiar painfully handsome man walked from the other side of the shelf. His hooded blue pools seem sleepy as if he just woken up from his slumber. His hair is touseled in a sexy way as if it was styled that way to make him look hotter.

What a damn sleepy hottie.

My cheeks stained red with that silly thought. Iiwas na sana ako ng tingin nang mapansin ko ang pagguhit ng isang matipid ngunit magandang ngiti sa kanyang mga labi.

"Hey. Need a hand?" His voice was deep yet soothing.

"Uhm." Nakagat ko ang aking ibabang labi saka ko sinulyapan ang aklat na pilit kong inaabot.

Bumalik ang tingin ko sa kanya. Siya naman ay tinignan na ang itaas na shelf kung nasaan ang aklat na kailangan ko. Mayamaya'y sinimulan niya nang humakbang palapit sa akin. Napaatras pa ako nang sumobra yata ang kanyang hakbang at halos tuluyan na niyang narating ang mismong harap ko.

The proximity is killing me. Humakbang ako paatras upang magkaroon ng sapat na distansya sa pagitan naming dalawa ngunit naging dahilan lamang ito upang umismid siya at makahulugang ngumisi.

"Virgin," He murmured. "Which one, Miss?"

Namumula ang pisngi konh itinuro ang malaking aklat na walang kahirap-hirap niyang inabot. What can I say? This man is almost six feet. Tila noong nagpaulan ng tangkad, habang mahimbing akong natutulog, siya naman ay nagtatampisaw.

He lifted the book in the air with one hand before he looked at me. His eyes stared at mine as if he's compelling me to do the same and no matter how much I wanted to look away, I just can't. My knees are trembling and my heart is pounding so loud. Too loud that I'm scared it will suddenly jump off of my ribs.

"I didn't catch your name," he said in a low tone while towering over me.

I gulped then tried my best to keep my composure. "Va...Va..."

His manly brows furrowed. "Valerie? Vanessa?" He guessed. "Wait, lemme think of other names." He joked.

"No." I sighed. "Vi...Violet."

Sumipol siya saka mahinang tumango. "I'm really bad at guessing," he chuckled softly that made my heart almost skip a beat.

Ang malawak niyang ngisi ay unti-unting naging matipid at makahulugang ngiti. Ibinaba niya ang libro saka niya ito inialok sa akin. "Nice meeting you again, Violet." Malumanay nitong sabi. Nang tuluyan kong tinanggap ang aklat ay kumindat siyang muli bago niya ako nilampasan upang umalis.

Sinundan ko na lamang siya ng tingin hanggang sa makaliko siya sa dulo ng shelf. Nang mawala siya sa paningin ko'y muli kong nadama ang parehong pakiramdam na dinulot niya noong una ko siyang nakita.

I held the book tightly as I try to calm myself. Ngunit bago pa man ako makabawi ay natanaw ko na si Lemuel na tila may hinahanap. Nang makita niya ako ay kaagad siyang naglakad palapit sa akin at dinampot ang bag at mga aklat sa aking paanan.

"I've been looking for you at the department's library. Akala ko doon tayo magkikita? Hindi mo pa sinasagot ang texts ko." Iritado niyang sabi.

Dinukot ko ang phone sa aking bulsa saka ito pinakita sa kanya. "Sorry. Phone's dead."

He sighed then rolled his eyes at me. "Fine."

Tinalikuran niya ako saka siya nagsimulang magmartsa patungo sa main reading area habang ako ay tahimik lamang na nakasunod, ang isip ay lumilipad pa rin dahil sa lalakeng kasama ko kanina.

Lemuel put the books on the farthest table, near the fiction section. Pinaghila niya ako ng upuan bago niya inilapag ang bag niya sa mesa at naupo.

"Okay, bago tayo magsimula, may sasabihin muna ako." Seryoso nitong sabi dahilan upang kumunot ang aking noo.

"Ano 'yon?"

Lumunok siya at luminga-linga. "Nabalitaan mo ba 'yong aksidente noong nakaraan?"

"Iyong dalagang nabangga ng trailer truck?" I flipped the first book open, "What about it?"

"Yeah, yeah. Maegan Whitmer. She's a graduating fine arts student from Ephraim State University. Guess why she got involved in the accident?" His brow cocked.

Lalo namang nagsalubong ang aking kilay. "Kasi stressed? Lutang dahil graduating na at matindi na ang pressure? Hindi namalayang naka-red ang traffic light?"

Lemuel's excited facade shifted to an annoyed one. "I really can't tell when you're being sarcastic and when you're playing dumb."

I chuckled softly. "Bakit nga kasi? Pwede mo namang i-kwento na lang."

A dramatic sigh left his lips. "It wasn't an accident. It was a suicide. An attempt to prove something."

Naglaho ang ngiti sa aking labi. "Suicide? Attempt? Attempt to prove what?"

Lemuel's expression darkened. His face went closer as he tried to look around, making sure nobody's listening. Hinawakan niya ang aking balikat saka niya ibinulong sa aking tainga ang sagot sa aking tanong.

"To prove that angels exist..."