Dear Ocean Sky

Chapter 15 | Kata

Kata noticed Alex leave halfway through Monday's advisory, and when she had texted her about it, Alex said she had a doctor's appointment. However, the next day she seemed pretty off so Kata suspected something was wrong, especially since she thought she saw Alex wiping tears off her face as she ran from the library during the suicide lesson. She confronted her about it, and Alex said that she was sensitive to the subject of suicide and it was still fresh on her mind. Kata felt that there was something Alex wasn't telling her, but she didn't seem to want to say anything about it so Kata didn't push. Besides, by Wednesday Alex seemed mostly back to her normal self. Although, she was an actress so it was hard to tell.

Kata sat in math, making faces at Alex from across the room. Even from where she was Kata could tell that Alex was trying not to laugh, and she found it very enjoyable. Alex made a motion for Kata to stop, but Kata didn't feel like listening.

Alex: Yk if u don't stop we're probably not gonna be anywhere near each other in this new seating chart cuz Ms. Ono won't trust us to sit together

Kata rolled her eyes, not wanting to listen to her friend but she knew she was probably right.

Kata: *sighs and pouts*

Kata: Ur taking away my fun with ur logic

Alex: That's what I'm here for :)

Kata laughed and was trying to come up with a witty response when she was pulled out of her thoughts by Ms. Ono's voice. "Miss Adams, would you please put your phone away?"

A light red color dusted Kata's cheeks for a moment as she put her phone on her desk. Ms. Ono gave her a sweet smile as she put Kata's completed test- from last week- face down on her desk.

Kata swallowed hard. She was taking algebra 1 which was a high school course that they offered in middle school. However, it still counted towards Kata's high school GPA so her mother was even more intent on making sure she got perfect grades in the course no matter what. This also meant that if she got anything below an A, or even below 100, her life would be a living hell for at least a few days, more depending on how bad the grade was. Because of this Kata worried every time she looked at her grades, but she was especially worried about this particular test. She had studied like crazy, but she couldn't seem to put an equation with a graph, which is what this test covered. She felt so stupid for not understanding it, but no matter who taught it to her, the information would get scrambled up in her brain somehow and it ceased to make sense. She thought she was starting to get it, but she was still worried about her grade.

Kata finally flipped over the paper after staring at it for about a minute. She took a sharp breath in. "80," she whispered.

Her mother was going to kill her.

***

"Kata you okay?" Mr. Benj asked Kata, shaking her out of her thoughts and back to the scene going on in front of her that she was supposed to be taking notes on.

"Um yeah, I just..." Kata stopped, trying to find words. Mr. Benj looked at her with kind eyes, and maybe that was the reason she said what she did next. "Truth be told Mr. Benj I'm really struggling with the subject we're covering in math right now, and I got a grade on my test that my mother isn't going to like. I'm really not sure what I'm going to say to her." She paused, expecting Mr. Benj to say something about how it-will-all-be-okay-because-your-parents-will-always-love-and-support-you-so- if-you-get-in-trouble-who-cares bullshit, but he just stood there listening. He was actually listening to what Kata had to say instead of brushing her off as every other adult would. He didn't seem like he was going to say any of that fairytale nonsense to her. "My mother, she wants me to succeed, but she just wants that so badly. I feel like she uses me to make her look good. I'm like a trophy to her, so if I mess up even the slightest bit then-" I'm scared of what she'll do to me. Kata thought but didn't say that for two reasons. Reason number one being that she didn't want Mr. Benj to think her mother beat her because if he did she would have to then explain everything and how her mother made her feel all the time and while Mr. Benj was great, she really didn't want to have to do that. The second reason being that she didn't want Mr. Benj to tell her to see the school counselor. She already tried that. It didn't work or help her at all. Kata sighed. "I just sometimes" Always. "feel like I don't matter, only my success does."