Fading (A Calum Hood Fan Fiction; Sequel to Pretending)

Chapter 18: The Other Her

2 weeks before

Right after our performance, I immediately ran back to my dressing room to get changed as quick as I could manage. Tonight's show here in New York City was indeed a blast, and by that I mean there were happenings like throwing water bombs and stuff at the stage as we sing. It was really hella fun, since it's our first time to perform in this city too. Everyone was so welcoming and my band and I feel so loved and liked. I even promised the crowd that someday soon, when we get the chance to tour on our own, this is the city where we'll perform first. I may have said this quite a lot already, but I am so in love with New York City that I can't just stop babbling about it.

I pulled my wet Guns 'N Roses shirt off of my head and quickly changed into one my comfortable hoodie jumpers, not wanting to catch a cold. I faced my mirror and reapplied some make up, thinking about the things that are going to happen in about few more hours. I know I will need to look really presentable, but at some point, I'm lacking some interest about dressing up. It's been three days, I know, but I still couldn't get over it. Call me exaggerated or whatever word would fit me, but I just get really affected over some things, big or not. I put down my stuff for a bit and sighed, as I ran a hand through my damp dark blonde hair. I closed my eyes for a few seconds, then breathed out the air I held on for a while.

It's been three days since that incident in the LA hotel happened. Right after it, I noticed that things between me and Michael just got a little worse than I thought. We're not even closer to being friends yet, and because of what happened that day, I feel like we're no way near into the process of being just friends anymore. He seems to always making sure that he's cold and distant towards me, and he's always rubbing it into my face that I can never have the chance to talk to him. I have always hated the fact about being rejected. Maybe this is why it hurts to take in the reality that some people around me doesn't really wanted to be associated with me. I don't even know why, though. If I would be given a chance, I would take it. I honestly want to know why Michael is being like that to me, and to Calum. It's just really bothering me, and I don't understand why I let it bother my head.

And maybe there's something worse than that. It's been three days as well, since Calum and I talked. That day, after Michael stormed out and walked away from where I was standing, I knocked on Calum's door and the moment he came out, he said he wasn't in the mood to hang out or even just go out of his hotel room. I didn't question about it anymore, though I really want to know why and what's bothering him. Whenever I try to talk to him, he's always walking away. And what makes me sad the most is that, I feel like he's keeping everything inside him, like even if he knows that he's got some people around him that he can talk to about it, he's just choosing to bottle it all up. I want to make sure he's okay. And if only I have it my way, I will let him open up to me. I swear I wouldn't mind, not at all.

After getting all retouched, I pulled my hair up in a stylish bun and immediately made my way to the backstage. The band's performance is already half way through middle, as I could hear from my dressing room and I wouldn't let another chance to pass for me to watch them perform. I took one of those passes and wore it on my neck, and stood beside Dave who's watching his boys, as he would always like to call them, perform in the stage that my band and I rocked on a while ago.

Luke and Ashton started exchanging chit chats on the stage as some of the band crews set some chairs up on the stage. Michael is setting his acoustic guitar while Calum sits down on the chair provided for him to sit on. I suppose that they would be singing an acoustic kind of song this time, since Michael have his acoustic guitar with him. I shifted on where I was sitting, somehow feeling a bit uneasy because it seems like everyone's eyes and cameras are all focused on me. I put up a smile on my face, and remained just that. I turned to my right, and saw a banner with "I SHIP CAIRA" written on it. Suddenly, I felt myself blush a little. I looked down the ground, having myself smiling particularly about something.