Silence | Book 1

3-14: Confession

"I'll be glad when I get home." Tristan sighed halfway through their walk back to the car, already looking forward to resting his sore feet. Hibiki nodded and stretched his arms out above his head, letting out a yawn without a shred of shame.

"I'm really sorry I wasn't there for you this afternoon."

A little confused by those words, Hibiki shook his head and frowned, giving his shoulder a soft push to cut it out.

"I know, but... it just feels like I failed you by letting you feel so bad, you don't deserve it." Tristan looked at Hibiki, telling him that he meant it. But Hibiki didn't let him, quickly writing a reply.

'Not your fault'

"Still, I could have,-"

'Not your fault'

Hibiki shoved the same message in his face a second time, telling him to stop blaming himself. He smiled a little and nodded, but it quickly faltered as he looked down at the ground again. From the corner of his eye he caught Hibiki typing, but he closed his eyes and sighed softly to try and banish the feelings of guilt out of his head. When he opened them again, it was to the sight of his own phone with Hibiki's message on it.

'You're the best thing to ever happen to me'

"Don't just say that." Tristan said with a shake of his head, yet he couldn't help but smile a little. Only to see Hibiki look at him dead serious, not taking that as an answer.

'You were there for me. You're still here for me, you didn't run from this crazy guy that can't even be alone for five seconds. So why are you so afraid to admit you're amazing?'

"I... I don't know?" Tristan shook his head, taken off guard by the intensity of the message. "But... I do feel like it when I am with you?" A weak smile graced his lips, and he watched as Hibiki's eyes widened slightly with the realisation that he had perhaps been too stern.

"I know I'm frustrating, but each time I'm with you it gets a little better." He nodded to himself, only to see Hibiki's gaze dart down to the phone, his thumbs quickly tapping another message.

'I'll say it as often as you need. You're amazing'

Without so much as a doubt, Hibiki gave his chest a poke, as if he could get those words in his heart if only he gave it enough of a push. Tristan smiled widely, as a warm glow spread through his chest. Until the heat became unbearable, and he couldn't look anymore, his gaze drifting sideways. Undoubtedly he was blushing, and he knew Hibiki knew, because a giggle bubbled up from him.

A hand on his wrist tugged at him, pulling him away from their set path, and although the sudden gesture surprised him, he willingly let it happen. He didn't care where they were going, since he knew that as long as Hibiki was there, everything would be alright.

They veered off from the main streets, onto a rainy path that led through a park. Finally Hibiki let go of Tristan, only to hold both his shoulders and keep him from walking further. With nobody around and no shame left even if there would have been, he leant forwards and laid his head against Tristan's chest. With one hand he held up the phone, once more showing the message, hoping that one of these times it would sink in forever – even if he knew that wasn't how anxiety worked, and that he couldn't blame Tristan for it in the end.

'I'll say it as often as you need. You're amazing'

"You too..." He heard softly, as he felt Tristan's arms around him, and he gladly sank into the warmth. It felt so good, it felt like more than a hug; it was safe and comfortable, and even through his coat and suit he could feel Tristan's heartbeat, and he knew that wherever he was, it would be there for him. He sighed deeply, closed his eyes and revelled in it, more at peace than he had been in a long time.