Reset | Jinkook ✓

+ Chapter 12.0

Waking was painful, an act that he had been trying to avoid for days.

Because it didn't matter if he had finally managed to coax Jungkook to him. Didn't matter if he had finally convinced him to stay by his side.

He always woke alone. Desperately and empty with his heart spilling over and breaking.

Yet today he felt -

Different. Better than he had before. Calmer. Like the terrible waves of heat had finally subsided and he could finally think straight. Could use things like common sense to figure out the reasons why his chest ached so badly.

How many petals had he released? How much damage had he done? All because he wasn't strong enough to resist the tug and pull of the alpha his omega had chosen. All because he had made the decision to stay behind that night instead of locking himself away somwhere. His suffering was entirely of his own doing. Entirely his own fault.

A sharp metalic sound caught his attention and he pushed himself up, instanty regretting leaving the soft warmth of the bed behind the moment his feet met the harsh cold of the wooden floor. But there was something drawing him forward, and he went where he was bidden. Snuck around the corner, foot steps nearly silently as he traversed the living room and -

There he was. So much like it had been at the beginning.

Only this time he was shirtless and Seokjin had to wonder if there was a god above at all. And if there was, what he had done to be forsaken like this.

"Hey." It was impossible to know how long he had been standing there - and he realized belatedly that he was still wearing the ridiculous clothing from the night before. Only the sweater had been traded for a tee shirt so large he was certain it didn't actually belong to him. "How are you feeling?"

"Better." There was a weird hung over feeling that always seemed to drag on forever. Like his body had been wiped out and had to slowly, carefully rebuild from the ground up. But the heat was no longer threatening to end him. Wasn't making him constantly ready to drop to his knees and beg for the alpha's knot.

"I'm glad." There was a soft smile crossing the other's features, and for a moment he feared that it would be awkward. That they would no longer know how to act around each other.

Or worse, that Jungkook would tell him he hadn't actually meant any of it at all. Would continue to reject him as he had before. Would leave him to languish in dispair and agony for as long as it took for death to come.

But there were fingers curling around his chin, forcing his eyes upwards - and he didn't even realize he had averted them, choosing to stare at the floor instead of face such an uncertain future.

"My eyes are up here, beautiful." Beautiful. Like he was something worth complimenting. Something worth having. Something worth actually keeping.

Like he meant something.

"Don't -" His hopes were already as high as he could allow. Already as raised as his heart would let them be. That this was finally over. That this phase of his life filled with longing and rejection could finally be over and the next could begin.

The one where he was loved. Where he was cherished. Where he was taken care of.

"I told you I was going to keep you." He wanted that, didn't he? Wanted it so much it made his chest ache. Made his ribs threaten to break apart and shatter.

"Please." His eyes fluttered closed against the onslaught of hot, foolish tears that suddenly threatened to fall. Because he could feel just how easy it would be to tear him apart. To ruin him now that he had offered himself up. Left himself so open and fragile.