The Writer (AU)

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Song- 18- One Direction
Harry's POV:

I felt scared. It wasn't the kind of scared people got from horror movies or the dark. This was the kind of scared you felt in your bones. The kind of scared you couldn't shake. Lying there in the hospital bed, my mind wandered to all the things I had and hadn't done.

Reminiscing on the trip we took to Africa when I was 4, Morocco when I was 9, summers spent in France, Denmark, Sweden, Russia, Australia, Germany, so many experiences and memories. Only, it seems the best ones I had were all with Ellie. I felt tears well in my eyes to think that there was a likely chance I wouldn't make it.

Sighing, I let them come. There was no reason to try and be strong or act like it was all going to be perfectly okay. I was okay with not being okay. The door opened once again and I quickly wipes my tears away as Ellie came into my view again.

"Are you crying?" she asked, sitting in the chair next to me.

"Yes."

"You're gonna be alright, baby. We're gonna do everything to get you better."

"I hope." I didn't want to admit to her how truly scared I was.
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As the weeks went on, it seemed that everyone eventually found out why I hadn't come back to school nor was able to play anymore. Ellie had switched from 42 to my number, 22, never failing to come to my house immediately after a game or practice every night. She'd written my initials on her shoes, and H on the inside of her wrist so many times with a permanent marker, it seemed they had become permanent. On the back of her jersey, she wrote my name as did all the girls and I smiled, seeing the picture on Instagram as I laid in bed for 19 hours a day.

I'd gone through chemotherapy and radiation, the treatments making me feel nauseated and causing my hair to start falling out. On the boys team, they'd all shaved their heads for me, when I found out, I teared up. I'd lost weight. 49 pounds and my joints constantly ached. I was weakened and Ellie still stayed with me night after night. On the weekends, it seemed she was there with me even when I was drooling on my pillow and constantly trying to stave off throwing up.

Her warm hand holding mine, giving me some semblance of strength to hold onto. She didn't let a nanosecond go by without telling me how much she loved me.

"If I get through this, you and I are going to get married," I'd tell her, just to help her keep hope. She'd lay down with me most of the time just so I would keep warm. When I was tired on the way home from the treatments, I would lay my head in her lap and she would just stroke my head, kissing my temple, and tell me how much she loved me.

Little did she know just how much I loved her. She was my rock against the thrashing waves. She was home.

"Mum," I coughed, hoping I'd be able to do what I was about to ask.

"Yes love?" she asked eagerly.

"Can we go out?"

"Where do you wanna go?" she smiled.

"I wanna go to Guiseppi's. I have something I need him to make for me."