mourir seul • nammin/minjoon •

• quinze •

Seconds turned into moments. Moments turned into minutes. Minutes turned into half an hour of complete silence. The only thing that could be heard was the wind from outside, flowing through the leaves of the trees surrounding the building, sometimes one-two bypassing cars from far away and Namjoon's silent and even breathing. It was chilly, but comfortable. Now, if Jimin would be stuck with Sereny instead of this weird guy, it would be perfect. He looked at the clock. 02:13 am. Then he looked back at Namjoon. He seemed like he fell asleep. His head was tilted to the side, his eyes closed peacefully, his body relaxed. Jimin took his time to examine him for the eighth time this night. He looked peaceful. No one would ever think he'd be the guy he is seeing him like this. Jimin even could want to have those big arms around him and lay against the chest they were hiding if he didn't know who- or how he was. He didn't even really know who he was. Just that his name was Kim Namjoon, that he assaulted Jin because of something and he's not afraid to use weapons. Jimin was even pretty sure that he had a criminal record. But.. in between the huge swarm of questions, there was a single one, sitting on a branch, not moving from it's majestic, impossible-to-ignore-pose, staring right into Jimin's soul.

"Why...?", Jimin whispered, almost inaudible. When he noticed he had just spoken out loud, he inhaled sharply, looking at the male next to him, desperately hoping he had really fallen asleep. His hopes were destroyed when Namjoon lifted his head, slowly opening his eyes and looking into Jimin's direction. He hummed. "Why what?", he asked, his voice a bit sleepy. He supressed a yawn, sat up straight and put his hands into his pocket.

"Why what?", he repeated, after a long pause filled with just... staring. Jimin inhaled as much of the air as he could, then letting it out slowly. His voice was not shaky anymore. If this Namjoon would've wanted to harm him, he would have done something by now. They were together in this room for almost 45 minutes. And more than the half of it, Namjoon kinda slept.

"Why are you doing this..?", Jimin finally asked, bringing up enough courage to raise his voice to a quiet, but not whispering tone, "Why were you threatening me the other time, then taking me to this doctor and then.. threatening me again but.. b-but..", he began to stutter, slowly losing his confidence, "but then be so nice to me..." He lowered his head again, his voice now was a whisper again. He cursed himself. He didn't want to appear so weak. But here he was. Namjoon looked at the, still, scared boy. What a convenience. "I wanted to explain that to you. Don't worry, i'll answer everything.", he assured him, they both looking at Jimin's motionless hands gripping the fabric of the blanket tightly. "I was... god, how do I explain..", Namjoon drove his hand through his hair, sighing lightly. Jimin looked up again. He could directly look into the others eyes without feeling the intense pressure and dangerous presence they were radiating just a few hours ago. Their gazes locked for a second. Namjoon couldn't tell if it was desperarion, fear or curiousity in Jimin's eyes. This time, he couldn't read the boys mind, he couldn't recognise his feelings. He absolutely despised it.

"I mean.. you're not the one who fucked up a contract with me, are you?"

"What?"

A contract? With him? Jimin had no single clue what he was talking about. When a little, but important thought crossed his mind, as Namjoon glanced to the door. "Do you mean.. Jin?", he asked, not caring if he appeared to be staring. Namjoon sighed and nodded. "Yes, I'm talking about Kim Seokjin. He broke a contract, that's why I was.. talking with him tonight."

"You strangled him over a broken contract?!", Jimin's voice wasn't loud, but it didn't need to be. His tone was shocked enough. "No. Yes. I.. I kinda did..."

"And what was this about?", Jimin, at this point, let all his questions out. New ones came, he let them out. He planned on shooting down every single one until the huge, black swarm was only a clear view full of answers. This was about the person he loved. His best friend, his brother, his Jin. Sudden confidence flooded into his body, letting his hand loose the grip onto the blanket.

"He should tell you that himself. I'm not im the place to tell you about his shady secrets."

One look. One split-second. One change of expression. His voice was cold. The sudden confidence got blown away by an even more sudden cold blow. His eyes were still soft, but not a pleasant kind of it. Namjoon leaned forward, resting his elbows onto his knees. "Look, I get that you are curious.", he started, looking up a bit due to his position, "But I won't tell you about what he did. That's between him and me. If he wants you to know, he's going to tell you." Jimin nodded lightly. Where was all the confidence? How could just one tiny little moment change the atmosphere of his inner world so fast? How could just one man change his expression so fast? Jimin didn't know. But he knew that he wanted to have answers. At least asking carefully doesn't have a high price, right? "Then.. tell me what you can tell me..", he spoke quietly, trying to not turn into a whisper. Namjoon leaned backwards again. He nodded once, slowly, keeping Jimin in his sight. "He owes me a lot of money. A few millions, to be exact. I was planning on contacting him digitally, but everything was ignored. So I approached him at the party. I didn't know you would be there too, I'm sorry for that." Jimin was stunned. Jin owed him multiple millions? And the payment was overdue? For how long? For what services? When did he sign a contract with him? Why did he never tell him? Didn't he trust him enough to tell him? And what was the fucking gun for? Jimin's hopes of destroying the swarm of questions crushed right on the spot. "And.. your other question.. ", Namjoon sighed, bringing his eyes onto the glass he and Jimin held together minutes before, "It's true, I was a bit harsh to you. But you got to understand my situation", he looked at Jimin, a small, hardly noticable note of desperation, "I was furious. I waited so long for Seokjin to do his part of the deal, but it never came. And I have my priority set on punctuality. You have to understand that I was not in the best mood, but I'm sorry for that." Jimin didn't look away this time. He couldn't. The man infront of him, or better his expression, was mesmerizing. He couldn't quite explain, but he didn't feel like looking away this time. "And.. to continue.. I didn't order my friend to pull the gun. I didn't want to put out weapons at all, since... well, you're not at fault, not a bit. This is why I'm not being harsh to you now. You're not the one who fucked up. You deserve kindness, otherwise it's not fair... I'm sorry for giving you a different impression." Namjoon looked defeated. But not in a weak way. Jimin knew he was honest. Though he wondered if he was just a really good actor, or a really sincere man. "And.. and when.. when you came in? Why..", he asked quietly, the last word inaudible. Namjoon bit his lip lightly. "What I dislike more than broken deals is when people talk bad about my team. Or to my team.", he explained, looking even more defeated, but still not a weak kind, "Christopher is one of my closest friends. And I really, really hate it when he and his abilities are not getting the respect they deserve."

"Oh..", Jimin couldn't oppose something. He knew that he was treating Chris not right when he suspected him not to be a real doctor or not doing his job right. "I'm.. i'm sorry.. I didn't mean to insult him.. I just..", Jimin apologised, regret building up in his mind. Without the treatment Chris gave to him, he'd probably not be as alright as he was right now. Namjoon sighed heavily. "I get that you're confused. And afraid. And you can hate me and despise me all you want, but please don't go against the ones that helped you. It's not fair.", he requested, having a soft tone, but Jimin knew that wasn't a real please.

Namjoon looked at the clock. 02:27am. He'd have to wake up early tomorrow. And Jimin needed to sleep. "If you're not having any desperate questions right now, I'll get going now, okay?" Jimin nodded lightly. There still were questions. How even knew Namjoon his name? Did Jimin ever tell him? But he didn't want to ask now. And he was too tired to process any more answers. Namjoon stood up, closing the window he left open. Then he stepped to side of Jimin's bed. "Think about what I said. Chris is trying to help you, so let him.", he said, bowing down a bit to let down the rest of the bed. Their heads were inches apart. Jimin quickly looked away. The pillow under him almost swallowed his head whole as Namjoon stood up straight again. His inner smile was showing. The sight of the small head, fluffy hair, laying in a pillow much too big for him made his mood lift a bit. "Goodnight, Jimin, you have to rest.", were Namjoon's last words before he went straight to the door. Jimin looked after him. He heard the door close, then he turned his head to the glass standing on the small table. Next to it, there stood the small box with chocolate chips. There was a small note under the box. 'Don't tell Chris!', Jimin read when he pulled it out. Something inside him had the utter desire to smile. And Jimin couldn't fight against it.

You're a cute one, babyface.