Dark Desire🖤

Chapter 21

Eran's POV

I stepped down from my car feeling all flustered and giddy as I walked towards my elevator. Today has been hands down the greatest night I ever had in a really long time. When I'm out with my friends, that's different, but today? It was just the best. It's been a long time since I had genuinely enjoyed an outing or so, but today I felt as if I had nothing to worry about. Cause she was here with me. 

Her running towards me, with excitement glinting in her beautiful black eyes, her blue hair scattered around her shoulder, her getting all shy because she was covered with just a bathrobe, her cheeks flushing after every three seconds I cracked a joke or flirted and just her and her and only her. I loved the little bickering session we had in the car as I joked about our favourite movies, made fun of her movie heroes she was crushing hard on.

I loved our little ice cream date that we had, absolutely hated the way her eyes moistured while talking about Daisy. I'm actually quite confused about Daisy. She wasn't like this before, we were friends and as far as I remember, when Jessica and Ricky continued with their juvenile behaviour, she and I, we both stated our views how we don't like each other and how this is never going to work. Like ever.

I lied on my bed and started to stare at the ceiling, drawing weird patterns with my eyes. After about three more minutes of me about to doze off, mom walked in my room with a smile on her face which warmed my heart. "It's so late, dear" she said as I sat up and furrowed my eyebrows. "Mom it's like 4 in the morning right now, why didn't you sleep?" "I was waiting for you" she replied as a pang of guilt hit right at my heart.

The look on her face worried me as if I had just suffered from a loss or something and I quickly turned the lamp on and took her soft hands in mine. Her chin wobbled as she looked at me, and my heart just broke. Her eyes were filled with shiny crystal like tears. Her voice trembling, as she finally spoke breaking the silence. "I just, couldn't take no more" her confession fell like rain on soft earth, as if each word contained the sorrow she bore all along the time I was out. 

She clasped her hands together, taking from mine as my gaze fell on my shaking knees. "Mom, it's okay, I'm really here for you. Tell me what happened" I asked as she drew in a huge breath and looked towards where I was staring five minutes ago.

"Your father and I, we said some things that we didn't mean, and those things weren't the most kindest, it cut deep" she said as I gave off a sigh of disappointment. I'm not really good with comforting words so I just sat there and continued to listen to her as I felt a knot forming in my stomach, and my heart started to grow heavier with the weight of the burden she carried in her heart. 

"I'm sorry, mommy" words came out of me, more like a whisper. She looked at me again as I looked away because it hurt me that I wasn't able to eradicate the pain etched on her beautiful face. "Your father and I had a lot of misunderstandings and fights over the years but I always had this reassurance that we will get through these someday, but.." her voice cracked as she pursed her lips together to contain the sob that was about to break free from the shackles of her unsaid emotions. "Today was just, different" she added, gulping down the sob. 

Me being me, useless as always, I just nodded and started to find ways to comfort her. I loved my dad, he was my hero but sometimes situations compels me to repel him. Yes I love my father, but my love surely doesn't let me get all blind to my mother's tears. I felt powerless, sitting right beside her as she stared into the distance with a tear or two caressing down her cheeks. The sight tore me apart. 

"Momma, I love dad but I hate seeing you all shaken up because of him" I said as her hands quickly found mine again and she directly looked at my eyes. "I love your father too, honey. More than any words could explain, but you know dear, sometimes what's shattered can't be fixed with love" she uttered words of truth as I swallowed. My throat thick with the lump sitting stubborn almost choking me. 

I sighed and swiftly looked at her. "Tell me what happened?" I asked looking straight at her as her gaze dropped and she started to fiddle with the hem of her maroon shirt. "Is it that bad mum?" I asked, tears threatening to appear any second as I started to blink rapidly. "Tell me that things will get better?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper tinged with sheer desperation. I could literally feel my longing for reassurance rising every passing second. 

She sighed and looked at me with a ghost of a smile appearing slightly. "We will get through this, dear" she replied with her tone heavy with tension and uncertainty which literally clenched my heart. Her face lightened up in a soft smile as I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her cheeks. "Everything will be fine mum, I promise" I said, a promise I don't know if I will be able to keep. 

Our family isn't fractured but there were multiple times when mom and dad broke out into terrible brawls, which basically ended up with dad leaving the house and going somewhere and mom locking herself in her room. I used to hate it when they fought when I was just a kid. As being just a kid, I understood how it used to hurt my mother because there were so many times I slipped tissue papers under the bathroom door, or whispered words of love when she was fast asleep with her eyes all swollen and face all red.

"But that doesn't excuse how you came this late at night" she said, finally returning to her older self which I love. I dramatically laid back on the bead with hands behind my head and stared at the ceiling, smiling wide. "Okayyy, what is up? Who's the girl?"she asked as I quickly got up and pushed her out my room a she started to giggle like a little kid as if she just discovered some hidden toffee under the pillow or something. "Bye" I said before I shut the door and she continued with her snarky laughter.

I closed my eyes and as soon as the darkness spread on my eyelids, my mother's grief stricken face appeared as my heart clenched. I quickly opened my eyes. I can't bear to see my mother like that, no matter what. Whenever I see her getting upset I feel as if someone stabbed my heart with a sword.

I drew in a big breath before I grabbed my phone and called Rose. I missed her already. It's been what, maybe an hour since I came back and it already feels like I didn't hear her since forever. Holding the phone on my ear with my right shoulder I opened a packet of chips and waited for her to pick the call up. The call disconnected after ringing for fifteen times. I checked the time and realized how stupid it was for me to call her like now. It's literally half past four in the morning.

I placed the phone back on the charge as I plopped on my bed, turning the lights off. As soon as I closed my eyes, images from our ice cream date surfaced like some long cherished film. I kept on replaying every bit of our conversations, every turns of our talk which made her spring into a confetti of laughter. Her voice, her giggling, her childish tone every now and then acting all cute made my ears long to hear her once again. 

I continued to toss and turn, trying desperately to find one comfy position to sleep in. I kept on turning my pillow to get the colder side, but the warm side wasn't getting enough time to get cold again and it resulted me getting the normal temperature of the pillow. Am I really talking about pillow temperatures?

I watched as the minutes slowly turned into hours and the sun started to peep out of it's safe nest as the morning birds started chirping. I sighed as I realized how even though my sleep deserted me today because of her, but the sheer joy of being lost in her thoughts and in her company was worth every single moment of sleepless nights.