He left to pursue his dream. She tried to stop him but ended up letting him go. The raw familiar feeling she felt when she heard his voice over the phone. That's when inflamed feelings started to rise again.
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As soon as I went home, I went inside my room and locked the door. I sat on the floor while my back is facing the cold wall. I cried and cried until I was catching my breath. May kumatok sa pintuan ko. I heard my Mama's gentle voice.
"Anak, si Mama mo 'to... Pwede pagbuksan moa ko ng pinto at mag usap tayo?"
I wiped my tears before standing up. Huminga ako ng malalim bago siya pinagbuksan. Bumungod sa akin ang aking boung pamilya. Tito Dante, Tita Issa, and my brothers all looked worried. Tinignan sila ni Mama ng mariin kaya mabilis silang nagsialisan. Bumalik ako sa aking pwesto at umupo muli sa sahig. I heard Mama's sigh before closing the door. She went near me and sat beside me.
"May video na kumakalat sa inyo ni Ral sa internet..." I wasn't surprised. I knew that would happen. "Kinakausap na ng Tito Dante at Tita Issa mo ang mga nagpost na burahin ang video."
"Kahit pa binura nay un wala na namang silbi. Nakita na ng mga tao."
Bumuntonghininga siya ulit. "Ano ba kasi ang nangyari, anak?"
I didn't answer her instead I just cried. Mama wrapped me in her arms.
"Shh... tahan na anak, nandito lang si Mama..."
Mama kept on whispering kind and sincere words to me that made me calm down. I was hugging her tightly while she was softly patting my hair.
"Alam mo anak, ganoon talaga ang pag ibig. It's not always rainbow and sunshine. Love is messy and complicated. Problems are there to test your love for each other. At kapag malampasan niyo yun, mas lalo niyo mamahalin ang isa't isa. Kaya wa'g ka bumitaw, ipaglaban mo hanggang sa dulo..."
"Pero paano kung... paano kung bumitaw na siya? Paano kung pagod na siya? 'Di pa rin ba ko bibitaw?"
"Kapag pagod na siya at pagod ka na, kailnagan niyo ng bumitaw. Ganoon naman talaga ang buhay, 'di naman 'to fairytale eh."
"Pero ayoko, Ma. Ayoko siyang bitawan..."
"Anak, love is not selfish. If you truly love him then you'll learn to let him go."
Tumatak ang sinabi sa 'kin ni Mama. Hanggang sa kinabukasan, naglalakad na ako patungo sa aking silid yun pa rin ang nasa isip ko.
"Oh my gosh! Irene! Are you okay?" bungad ni Chie.
Last night they also bombarded me with messages asking if I was okay. Pati sila Narumi.
"Gaga! Anong klaseng tanong yan?! Malamang hindi!" si Elyse.
"Girl, we're here for you okay?" si Jewel.
"If you want to cry then go ahead! Sasasabayan ka pa namin!" ani Nica.
I lightly chuckled and sat on my seat. Nagkatinginan silang apat at walang ibang ginawa kundi umupo na lamang. Dumating na ang aming guru. That's what happened for the past month. I let myself become busy with school.
