Opposites

1.6

sorry i have not updated in a while been super crazy also i am v lazy

Justin went straight home after he dropped off Cali at her cousin’s. He shouldn’t have given her one of his favorite tee shirts to keep. The image of her all bloodied and bruised haunted his mind. The entire event would probably haunt him for the rest of his life, or at least for a while. Justin was so focused on everything that had happened, he hadn’t even noticed his dad’s car in the driveway. 

“Justin,” he turned to face his father.

“You’re back early?” Justin said questioningly. 

“I got a call,” his father began. He looked askance at him.

“Tell me about it when I’ve woken up from my beauty sleep. I need some rest.” Justin started to walk up the stairs to his room in order to avoid whatever it was that his father wanted. His dad called out to him once more in order to get his attention.

“Why do you have a black eye? Fall in the shower again?” his dad chuckled to himself.

“I’ll be up in a few hours, we’ll talk then.” Justin said, clearly agitated.

“Tamara will be over in a few minutes,” his tone quickly changed from playful to serious. “You have to talk to her. The entire reason I even came home is because I was told by Tamara you were hanging out with the wrong crowd. She told me that you dumped her for some girl with a bad reputation around here. She said you’ve been sleeping with her after only knowing her for two months. This isn’t acceptable behavior. You go to college in September. Grow up and talk to Tamara. You need her in your life.” he spoke with disdain. 

“What? Why would you ever believe that?” 

“You know why.” his dad spoke coolly. 

Justin went up to his mom’s old music room and ignored his dad’s comment. His mom left the guitars. She didn’t take even one of them. He picked up his mom’s favorite, which happened to be the one he helped Cali play. He took a deep breath and messed around with the instrument. Justin didn’t know why he bothered to even spend time in that room, he hated his mother. He stopped playing and put his head in his hands. You know why, his dad’s words repeated in his head. His dad didn’t want him to be like his mom. He didn’t want Justin to cheat on Tamara like his mom had done to his dad. He felt his eyes swell with tears, but blinked them away. 

“Justin,” Tamara stood in the doorway a few minutes later. 

“What do you want?” he sighed, ready to get their repetitive conversation out of the way. 

She shut the door and walked over to him. She sat down, “Justin, I’m so sorry. I hadn’t of even been fooling around with that guy for that long. It was only about a week. I was just so mad. You were spending so much time with Cali and I got jealous. I need you, baby. I always have, I always will.”

“Tam, you can say sorry all you want,” he rubbed his temples and finally looked up at her, “but the cheating and the time I’ve been spending with Cali is not the reason for why I broke up with you. I’m not sleeping with Cali. I just don’t want to be with you. You stopped making me happy. I realized I wasn’t in love. Sure, I love you, but I’m not in love with you. I don’t think I could ever be-”

“I’m an alcoholic,” she blurted out at the end of his sentence. Justin stared at her, completely stunned. 

“You’re w-what?” he practically whispered. Why would she have brought this up now, he thought to himself.

Tamara leaned her head against Justin’s shoulder and started to cry. 

“It’s almost been a year. I just can’t stop. I’ll be coughing up my guts repeatedly before I can even realize that I need to take a rest from drinking. You were helping me with it in small bits. You always made me feel more stable and safe. I don’t want you in my memory, I want you now, presently and forever.” Tamara’s voice cracked at the end.

“Forever?” 

“How could you be in love Cali but not me?” she stood up and glared at him through her curtain of tears. She randomly was coming up with this stuff. 

Justin couldn’t respond, he didn’t know how to.

“I d-don’t love her.”

“Can you picture yourself with her, Justin? Hmm? Do you think about her in that way?”

Justin’s mouth just hung open at her questions. He was truly astounded by his state of mind and everything she was saying and asking of him. 

“Do you have feelings for Cali?” she played with the hem of her purple blouse. It looked like it hurt her to speak.

Justin didn’t reply to that either. He just stared through her as if she were a window. He pursed his lips and sighed. Tamara met his vacant gaze with a look of anguish and remorse. She didn’t bother to say anything more than what she had already. She raced out of the room. Justin continued playing his mother’s guitar as if the previous scene had never happened. He couldn’t focus on anything else but himself for the moment. Unexpectedly, Justin’s dad precipitously came through the door. 

“What are you doing in here?!” he roared. 

Justin finally came back to reality and set his mother’s favorite guitar down, “Dad, I’m so sorry.”

“You cheated on Tamara, you’re sleeping with someone, you haven’t been studying for college, you’re not hanging out with your friends anymore and you are in your mother’s old music room.” his father snarled out.

“I’m eighteen, you can’t punish me for stupid stuff like this anymore.” Justin swallowed down the lump in his throat. He wasn’t usually this blunt with his father. 

“You’re right, I can’t. You may live in my house, I may be paying for your tuition and books and living expenses, but by all means, I could never punish you for your behavior. Don’t act like a barbarian under my roof. Remember who I am.” Justin’s dad raged on. 

“You’re right,” Justin tried to play things safe, “I’ll start picking up on my studies and behaving better. I mean it.” The lump in his throat returned. He blinked rapidly as if doing so, would erase everything before him and everything that had happened. He had to play things safe.