Sunshine After The Rain

Chapter Forty-Three

Sophie felt as if she were trapped in some delicious dream or romance movie. There Lucas was, ice skating with her children, Ella's hand in his own. He glided across the ice with ease, keeping Ella from falling as her smile beamed up at him. 

Justin was happy to see him at the house, unable to hide his true emotions for the man, but acted a bit standoffish now, hesitant to trust in the moments happiness, which Sophie understood too well. 

After her talk with him several months ago, her son had become more guarded around Lucas. Justin loved the man. That much was certain. But he didn't love him for the role he wanted in Sophie's life. Because Lucas had made her sad, he would now have to prove to Justin that he was in this for the long haul. He would have to show him that the good he could offer this family outweighed the sadness of the past. It was no simple task, but Sophie trusted Lucas would win over her son yet again. 

"I still can't believe he's here," her mother remarked as she sat down on the bench beside her, two cups of hot cider in hand. "I was biting my tongue about his whole thing, because I thought this was all happening too soon after Jason's passing, and with his brother no less. But you light up around Lucas in a way I never saw with Jason. I know that probably isn't something you want to hear, but it's something I need to say. It isn't me speaking ill of the dead, it's just me stating a fact."

Because she'd kept her marital problems a secret from her mother, who left town before she ever met Anna, she wasn't aware at how often Sophie had spoken ill of the dead. 

What happened impacted her life in such major ways, both with the accident and what transpired just before it. Yet it didn't have a hold on her as it did before. Instead, it was just a piece of her reality.  She did love her husband and her husband had loved her; but they'd never had the storybook love. They hadn't been each other's soulmates. 

His death was something she had come to terms with, slowly as she waded through all the muck he'd left behind. And his infidelity was hard, but somehow also acted as a lifeline. It made it easier for her to let go, and easier to accept the soulmate she'd found in his brother. It was also the bridge built between her and the rest of his family. 

She'd been angry about it once upon a time, and ashamed, but not anymore. "Jason was unfaithful," Sophie spoke, allowing her truth to escape in the blistering winter wind. There was no longer need to hide it. There was no longer reason to feel ashamed or struggle to admit to her mother the truth of her marriage.

"How do you know that?" Her mother's voice didn't sound startled or skeptic by the news. It hadn't come out harsh or anything. It was if she'd spoken any other sentence. 

"Because he admitted it just before he died. That's why he was out on the road at that hour. We separated that night." Just as it had been the first time, the second, and the third, it was freeing telling her truth once more. "His mistress gave birth yesterday. A baby girl."

She felt her mother's eyes on her a good long time before she spoke. "You don't seem upset about it."

"I'm not," Sophie admitted with a shrug. "A life coming into this world is a beautiful thing to come out of a heartbreaking situation. My husband died seven months ago, almost to the day. He had secrets and flaws, and a heart that was being ripped into two different directions. Our marriage was over, but not because I failed as a wife, or because she stepped in and took what was mine. It was over because he chose to end it. 

"I have a second chance at love, mom. It won't be perfect because nothing is, but that man loves me in a way I've never felt loved before. And I love him in a way I never thought possible. It might look like it's happening too soon, but I've been waiting a very long time to feel this important to someone and to feel this loved. I didn't choose to fall in love with him, but I'm ready to give into it because I deserve to be loved."

Sophie was no longer ashamed of the affair. Her husband's actions were his own, and if she could see into the future, she would have realized there was something truly incredible waiting for her out there in the world. The heart that beat inside her chest now belonged to another. It and her were worthy of love, and Sophie was ready to give in. 

"Yes, you do," her mom agreed.