Sunshine After The Rain

Chapter Eleven

"You're sure you want to do this?" Lucas asked for maybe the twentieth time that day.

Sophie looked up at the enormous house her in-laws owned before she glanced in her rear-view mirror at Anna's car behind her.

The children were with the neighborhood's babysitter, but she could only watch them for the next two hours before she had to go to another job. Hopefully, it would be enough time.

After that, Lucas would have to hit the road and return to his normal life.

"I'm sure," she confirmed yet again.

Sophie had cried halfway through the night before falling asleep. Jason, her husband, the father of her children, and the only man she's ever loved, was dead. Until yesterday, it was always 'her children's father was dead', or 'the man who wanted to divorce her was dead'. Sophie was so focused on her anger and frustration that she ignored the bare bones reality of having someone she loved no longer on this Earth. Because much of her hated him for leaving her, that love she felt was blocked out for the sake of her sanity.

Now that she'd experienced even a fraction of the genuine pain within her, Sophie was still determined to go through with this. No matter what her subconscious reasons were, there was at least one that was pure enough to persevere.

Strange how Lucas accepted her judgment better when she was a mess compared to the level-headed way she'd spoken the first time. When Sophie went to him that morning, mascara streaks beneath her puffy, bloodshot eyes, and declared she did, in fact, want to go through with her decision, he seemed a world on board compared to before.

Still, Lucas felt the need to confirm she was certain about what they were about to do. It wasn't too late to change her mind, but when she opened her car door, it was her ultimate confirmation.

The car door behind them slammed shut, then hers, then Lucas'. He'd only spoken to her for a few minutes before leaving the house, but relented once they got in the car the woman seemed kind and innocent enough. It was nice hearing her judgement wasn't as crappy as it'd been in the past, giving her the slight confidence boost she would need to get through these next two hours.

Hell, maybe they'd be done in mere minutes. Maybe they'd kick Anna's ass to the curb and scold Sophie as if she were a child, like so many times before.

As the three reached the door, Sophie looked at Anna, who gave her a nervous smile. She looked beautiful even through her grief and jitters, but if they accepted her into the family by any measure at all, that would change soon enough.

Having Laura as her mother-in-law aged Sophie twenty years in the last nine. She felt old, despite not having turned thirty yet, and haggard beyond repair. Her neighbors said having kids did that to you, but Sophie was pretty well certain it was all Laura.

Then she glanced over to Lucas, who was already looking back at her with the warmest of close-lipped smiles. He was such a gentle giant, even when frustrated with her. Though Sophie guessed she'd manage without him when he left, she hadn't a clue how. She reached for his hand, noticing it was the first time she'd held it since they first met earlier in the week, and it already felt strangely familiar and comforting.

When Laura opened the door, despite them not having knocked, Sophie dropped the hand before Laura could notice the innocent gesture, and make it out to be something it wasn't.

Lucas let out a cough and slid his hands into the pockets of his worn jeans.

"And who's this?" Laura asked, her bloodshot eyes fixated on Anna.

Anna extended her hand, but when Laura looked at it, she turned it into a slight wave and took a step closer to Sophie. "I'm Anna."

"Lucas, as lovely as I'm sure she is, don't you think your timing is a tad poor, all things considered? I believe another visit would have been a better opportunity to introduce your girlfriend, or fiancée, or..." Laura's eyes travelled up to stare into Anna's soul, "what do they say in those trashy shows? Baby momma, I believe."

Never in a million years did Sophie ever think she would hear Laura use the phrase 'baby mamma', and it felt like Christmas morning. Unfortunately, it was short lived and the reality of the statement was like a cloud over an otherwise classic comment. "She isn't Lucas' baby mamma," Sophie confessed, gearing herself up for the most awkward situation in her life. "She's Jason's."

What little natural color was on Laura's face drained and her mouth gaped open. "I beg your pardon?"

"Anna was Jason's mistress, Laura," Lucas explained further, seeming to get a sliver of joy. "You know, sort of like you were my dad's before you got pregnant."

If Laura's eyes could shoot dagger's, Lucas would have one sticking from his forehead as he lay dead and bleeding on Laura's expensive landscaping. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder, dear boy. You're heading home today, aren't you?"

When Lucas only responded with a growl, Laura continued. "I'm sure you're a lovely girl, but you're also a mistaken one. I assure you, my son was faithful to the woman standing beside you. While I don't doubt you may have been sleeping with a married man, that man was not my son."

"I already knew he was having an affair, Laura," Sophie spoke up when it appeared Laura was attempting to shield herself from the truth. "He confirmed it the night he died. Jason was on the road that night because he was leaving me. I tried to tell him he could leave the next morning, when it wasn't storming out, but he wouldn't stay."

Complete and utter word vomit spewed from Sophie's mouth, tears filling her eyes as she remembered the moment he declined to stay and kissed her on the top of her head. She hadn't seen it or felt it then, but as Sophie relived that night in her head, she recalled how gentle his kiss was, not indifferent like she'd suspected it was. Jason hadn't decided not to stay because he wanted to spend the night with Anna, but because he didn't want to see the pain he caused and second guess his choice.

It was all just a guessing game, but Sophie felt it in the depth of her soul. Now that she'd allowed herself to feel the loss, she was also allowing herself to feel the love he felt for her and the shame that consumed him.

Both Garett and Anna confirmed that he was intending to leave her, and likely would have if Anna hadn't become pregnant. Garett and Lucas confirmed that Jason said that he loved Sophie and hated himself for what he was doing, or in Lucas' case, what he was tempted to do.

Sophie felt two enormous arms wrap around her, while one smaller hand rest on her back. "I promise, I tried to get him to stay the night."

But did she try hard enough? That was the question now in her head that Sophie feared would plague her for the rest of her life. If the conversation had gone differently, if she hadn't acted so coldly, would he still be dead? If she'd gone to sleep early like she'd considered, would Jason have pushed the conversation off to the next evening? Perhaps Sophie's biggest 'what if' was if she hadn't suspected the affair or pulled away to make the impact hurt less. Would he have ended the affair before Anna became pregnant and spent the rest of his life with her?

"If this isn't some sick, terrible excuse for a joke, I'd recommend you taking your hand off my daughter before I have it physically removed from your body."

Sophie felt Anna's hand leave her back, causing Lucas to hold her more tightly than before. "She didn't know, Laura," Lucas chimed in. "Jason told her he was separated from his wife and was going through a divorce. Apparently had an apartment he pretended to live in and everything."

Jason had gone to impressive lengths to begin and maintain his charade, providing him with so many outs he never took. He could have been honest and said he was married, end his flirting fun, and gone back home to Sophie. Surely there were many times while he looked at apartments where he knew how wrong this all was.

While her husband apparently loved her, and hated himself for the lies he told and the truths he never spoke, he made the conscious decision to cheat and continue to do so, no matter how difficult it all became.

"I think it's best we go inside," Laura said after a full minute of silence had passed. "Call Joel and see if he can come home. It was his first day back at work."

Because of Laura needing to protect Sophie, she knew the woman was feeling much more than what was on the surface. Calm and collected was her permanent demeanor, but it was all just a facade. Sophie considered herself fortunate to see it falter, not once, but twice in the last week. It helped proved that although Laura had this forever indifference toward Sophie, there was also some level of trust there. Maybe it wasn't complete indifference as she thought. Maybe there, beneath the rough exterior, was a sliver of love for her.