Sunshine After The Rain

Chapter Thirty-Three

Sophie allowed her fingers to trail across the smooth wood of the staircase banister, noticing the stick detail and grain. This was her first time in the house since before her falling out with Lucas, and it was positively beautiful.

The contractor she hired told her of someone sneaking onto the job on nights and weekends, things being changed or added while they were away. Sophie allowed it to continue. She didn't hate Lucas. Hate was an impossible emotion to feel for him. The man had made a promise to build her her dream house and he was following through, despite being fired.

Lucas was made aware by Joel, who she still wasn't sure knew of what transpired between the two of them, that she still intended to sell the house once it was complete. That's what confused her. He followed through on his promise and continued working on the house although she had no intention of ever living in it. Maybe he thought that once she saw his masterpiece, she'd change her mind. Which she did. Again and again. 

In the end, she decided to move across country to live with her mom once the school year was over.  It was something she'd told her in-laws about only yesterday. Both cried and hugged her, refusing to allow themselves to argue against her decision. It wouldn't be for forever, but Sophie couldn't continue buying houses on a whim. There was money she'd received from her husband's accounts, and life insurance, along with the money she'd have selling her house here, but she wasn't going to waste it on pipe dreams. 

It'd been three months since she last spoke to him, two months since the job was complete, and she still hadn't found the courage to step into this house until now. 

He'd missed Justin's birthday party, which she reluctantly invited him to, but had picked him up from Joel and Laura's the weekend after. Sophie had turned the big three zero only two weeks ago, and although her in-laws offered her a party, instead she had them take the kids and spent the day and night alone, just driving. 

"Are you sure you want to sell this place?" Anna asked from downstairs. 

That woman had been her saving grace since her and Lucas had their second falling out. Due in less than two months, Sophie hated the idea of leaving her so soon after she'd given birth. A first time mother needed a support system, but she had that in Joel and Laura now. They'd grown to care for her as Sophie did. 

"Why don't you live in it?"

Anna laughed at the comment. "Because it's way too much house for me, and too far away from my job. Nah. I like where I am."

"I don't," Sophie admitted in a hushed tone. "Holding onto the house I shared with Jason is forcing me to live with a ghost still controlling my life. And if I live here.... I need to give up hoping that somehow Lucas is going to show up, declare his love, tell me how wrong he was. Even if by some miracle he did do that, I wouldn't be able to trust in it. I still love him, Anna, and I probably always will, but this house is too connected to him. I mean, it's perfect for me, but standing in this place is killing me because it's a future I wish I could have had."

"Then let's get out of here," Anna said with a sad smile.

Sophie nodded her agreement and walked down the stairs, risking a glance at the dream dining room table that had snuck it's way into the house at some point, but pried her now teary eyes away from it before she could take in the details. 

*************

Sophie drove to her in-law's house after a long day, wondering how in the hell she had gotten to this place in her life. Ten years ago she had this big future waiting for her to embrace it. Now here she was, a widow and feeling like a stranger in her own life. 

No decision felt like the right one. Every door she opened seemed barricaded by a brick wall on the other side. A few months ago, she felt excited for a second chance at life. It felt like both a lifetime, and only moments ago. 

When Sophie stepped into the giant house, it was strangely quiet. No children running around, no voices in the near distance. She looked behind her to confirm their car was in the driveway, then closed the door behind her, stepping further into the house until she saw two figures in the living room with only a single lamp illuminating the room. 

"What's wrong?"

Laura dipped her head while Joel scratched at his temple, then stood from the couch. "I decided to go to grief group tonight. It was already started by the time I got there, and overheard a story in the hallway before I walked in. Lucas' story."

"Okay?" Sophie wasn't certain where they were going with this.

Joel looked down at his wife, who gave him a hesitant nod. "I'd like you to go with me next week."

Sophie took a step back. It was true, she should have been going to grief group this whole time. But it was hard enough to open herself up to the idea, without adding Lucas' presence into the mix. "No."

It was Laura who stood now, side by side with her husband. "I need you to do this, Sophie. Before you put that house up for sale, I need you to listen to Lucas. To talk to him."

Nothing would make a difference at this point. He'd still made it clear they wouldn't be together, and he'd still broken her trust. A part of her would always love the man who stepped into her life and helped piece it back together, but he was also the man who broke it yet again, leaving her more confused and lost than she had been before. 

"I can't," Sophie told them.

"Just this once," Joel pushed. "For us."