Dancing in the Dark ✓

25 | sasha

I had been so lost in thought that I didn't realise when we had reached my house. I exhaled heavily, calming my my racing heart, and glanced at Theo, who had wind down the windows and killed the engine. "You don't have to wait for me."

He gave me an incredulous look. "And ruin my plan to watch my movie in the car? No way. I'm staying here."

I chuckled. "Alright. Don't complain when I come out three hours later."

I raised a fist and knocked promptly on the front door. The door swung open almost immediately, as if someone had been waiting for me. I cleared my throat. "Dad."

"Sasha," my dad greeted, exhaustion lacing his voice, the dark circles under his eyes a bit more prominent. "I'm glad you stayed safe."

I swallowed. "You're not mad?"

"Of course not," he replied. "Come in."

Joshua was seated at the dining table watching a cartoon on the iPad. At least one of us didn't feel like the world had crumbled down. 

My dad cleared his throat. "Your jiĕjie is back."

Joshua smiled from ear to ear and gave me an enthusiastic wave. "Jiĕjie! Dad said you were having a sleepover. Was it fun?"

I forced myself to nod. "Yes, I'll bring you next time." 

I followed my dad to the dining table, where he sat down opposite Joshua and I. 

"Your mom called," he started simply. 

Even Joshua paused, the pitch of his voice increasing. "She did? Is she coming back for Christmas?"

My dad shifted in his seat. "Sorry, Josh. She can't make it. I'm not sure if she'll be coming back anytime soon." 

Joshua's shoulders slumped, which made my heart squeeze. I gave him a pat on the head. "Mom's just busy with her new life. But remember, you've got Dad and me -- and Theo gēge."

He looked straight at me. "Does Mom not like us?" 

My dad huffed. "That's a silly question. Remember the story of how she fought the doctors to have you? Life's just busy for her now, but I promise no matter how busy I become, I'll still be around, alright?"

"But I miss Mom."

"We'll call her for New Year's, so that you know when she'll next see you," my dad consoled. "By the way, Joshy, could you go into the living room for a while? I've got to clean the table."

Joshua didn't seemed satisfied with the answer, but nodded and headed into the living room. Once he was out of sight, my dad rubbed his eyes. 

The silence stretched. I swallowed my pride and said, "Dad, I'm sorry."

He sighed. "I'm the one who should be sorry. I had a go at your mother, because I knew you wouldn't have disappeared like that without a reason."

"She asked me to leave you and Joshua," I replied quietly. "She wanted me to go to L.A and dance." 

"More or less what I expected. Are you sure you don't want to go?"

"I'm not leaving you guys behind." 

"You know you'll have to leave for university eventually, right?"

"Which is why I've decided on aiming for UofT. It's close, and it's a good uni." 

My dad shook his head, releasing another exhausted exhale. "I'm sorry I couldn't hold our family together."

"No, Dad, don't say that," I blurted, horrified by the tears threatening to spill from my eyes. "You've done so much. I remember when you let me sit on your shoulders, I felt like I was on top of the world. And I still do."