Dancing in the Dark ✓

29 | sasha

The days were flying by within a blink of an eye. Us, seniors, had long submitted our university applications, and were now anxiously waiting for offers to roll in. I had applied for the nearest universities to Toronto, under language courses. I still didn't know exactly I wanted to do, but working as a translator sounded quite flexible and exciting, so I figured to give it a go. 

I also had something else to occupy myself with besides overthinking -- my two-minute long solo for the Spring Musical, as a special senior appearance, right after intermission. 

Leilani, who did most of the convincing to the musical director, was adamant to oversee my rehearsals. I had warned her that I was going to be rusty, which caused her to clear out her house's basement so that we had space to dance. 

"Warm up!" She hollered over the blasting Disney music. I swear the mirror rattled.

She had chosen a warm up sequence that we used to do all the time in our dance class, so I kept up with the steps due to muscle memory, but keeping up with Leilani's flexibility and stamina was definitely not happening. The difference was so obvious, in our kicks and in our energy that I suddenly collapsed onto the floor right before the warm up ended.

She glared at me accusingly. "Sasha Li! What's this? Giving up? Sasha Li never gives up!"

I shook my head in defeat. "I'm just so out of shape."

"That is why we're whipping you back into shape within these weeks," she replied matter-of-factly. "Come on, let's get it! Good vibes only! Positivity! Do it for Charlotte!"

I groaned and sat up, although the wooden floor felt really comfortable just then. "Fine."

"Have you listened to the music you're supposed to dance to, at least?"

"Yes. It's the instrumental intro of The Lonely Goatherd yodel song right?"

"Exactly. Luckily for you, I'll be helping."

We exchanged ideas back and forth, agreed and disagreed, just like the times when we had to choreograph together. We bickered but didn't take it personally, and always gave each other's idea a try before dismissing it and moving on. Leilani was a whirlwind not stopping anytime soon, being fueled by the creativity she was creating. Me, on the other hand... I was faintly reminded of how it felt to create a dance piece, a story, but for some reason, there was something missing.

We stopped after the first two hours, perspiring profusely. Leilani sighed a little sadly. "Sasha, I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to say it as it is. I can tell you've moved on."

I was about to fire back, but she shot me a knowing smile. "I'm not saying that you're not putting your heart into this, not at all -- I just think that you've moved on from pursuing it professionally. Of course, moving on is always bittersweet, but I think you've found the closure you needed after your long break."

It was my turn to sigh. "Yeah... somewhere along the way, I realised the lifestyle wasn't for me. But you, on the other hand, better continue down the path we planned to go on since we were little girls with big dreams."

She nodded. "Definitely. I know it's not going to be easy, making a career out of your passion, I'm lucky that I'm privileged enough to have opportunities to get recognised and receive training. And with such supportive parents and friends, I know I can get through it."

I smiled. "Don't forget me when you're famous."

She laughed heartily. "Of course not. You've latched yourself too deeply onto my heart."

I pretended to cringe. "Stop that cheesy nonsense."

"Maybe I will, the day you get comfortable with verbal affirmations. I see that day coming soon. I mean, with Theo and all..."