The choice

Remember

I pull away from Blaise Zabini's lips staring into his eyes. He looks so happy... I stare at him blanking. Knowing this doesn't feel right... I don't even know what doesn't feel right about it. I feel like my heart has dropped to my stomach and this uneasy feeling all around me.
"I should get going now..." I force a smile at him.
"I can take you back to hogwarts!" He offered eagerly. I've never seen him more open and talkative in my life.
"It's okay I wanna think about some things, I'll be alright" I kiss him on his check and I make my way out.
The sky looks so beautiful tonight and the stars are shining brighter than I have ever seen them. I start walking towards the forest as if it was drawing me in. It felt like the universe was pulling me towards this path and I had no choice but to listen. I continue my walk and I walk towards a edge where I can see the entire view of Hogwarts. It's beautiful, I have the sense that I have seen this before. It all feels so familiar. There goes that feeling again... so hallow and empty. I can't stand this.. I have no idea why I'm so sad looking at something so beautiful. The feeling overcomes me pulling me to my knees and I start crying. What the hell is wrong with me?
I hear something ruffling from behind me. I quickly wipe my tears and pull out my wand looking alert.
"Hey it's just me Montague!!" A boy approach's me through the shadows. The voice gave me a sense of calmness.
"What the hell Fred!" I sigh with relief. "What you are full blown stalking me now?"
"No I- I was just coming here to think.." he said not looking me in the eyes.
"Okay than I will just leave you to it then.." I don't know when things became so weird between us but it's best to just give him his space. As I walk past him he grabs my wrist stopping me.
"Why did you come here"
"I- I- don't know honestly. I just felt kinda Drawn to it I mean it's definitely a pretty view to clear your head"
He stood there staring at me blankly. He looked disappointed with me. And for reasons I might never know I felt guilty.
"Do you want to stay?" I was shocked he asked me that.
"Yea I would" I smiled at him. He sits down and I go a sit next to him. We sat in silence for a what felt like hours. There is something familiar about this moment with him and I can't figure it out.
"What's going on in that pretty little head of yours Montague?" He whispered to me.
"Do you ever feel like something is off a bit... like some things are missing? There are a lot of blank spots and it's driving me crazy"
He stared at me frowning his eyebrows.
"Your going to get wrinkles if you keep looking at me like that Fred" I joked with him. Hoping to get on his good side.
His eyes still pierced at me. My heart raced waiting for him to say something to me. Why is he just staring at me??
"Why do you hate me? I don't get where things changed... but I can't take you hating me Fred. So please tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it. Please.." I finally exploded.
"Hate you?? I don't hate you... I don't think I can ever hate you.. I'm so bloody In love with you it makes me sick. I see your face in my dreams... your my first and last thought I'm fucking mad about you but you... you chose to forget me.. and I can't look at you without wanting to cry like a baby..."
He has tears in his eyes and I start tearing up too. He loves me?
"Chose to forget you? What—."
"You wanted to forget us... and you had your new Slytherin boyfriend oblivate any memories we had together" he said standing up.
"Why would I want to forget you?? I'm not understanding help me understand what's going on."
I grab his arm trying to get him to tell me more. I knew something felt off.
He looked as if he was going to tell me but he stopped himself.
"It doesn't matter you clearly wanted to forget it so I don't want to hurt you all over again.."
"What if I want to remember again.. how can I get them back? I- I can't keep going on like this I feel so so empty all the time and I just I can't stand it. Help me please"
"The person who casted the spell is the only one who can reverse it.. and to be quite frank I don't think Zabini is good enough to cast it"
"Oh.." I can't even look him in the eyes how did I mess up so badly.
We stared at each other in silence. He looks so hurt... how could I hurt someone who loves me so much?
"Look... I'm not giving up on you... I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you fall in love with me again. So don't think because you can't remember when you loved me that you are getting rid of me that easy." He gave me a smirk and gently bumped my chin.
"Lucky me" I smiled and kissed him on the check.
"Let me take you back to the dorms it's dark out I don't need anyone kidnapping you"
"My hero" I lock my arm with his as he leads the way.
"So you and Zabini huh? He really swooped in and took the opportunity to snag you. I guess it's the Slytherin in him.. ambitious bastards they are." He joked with me.
"I'm not with Blaise.. he is sweet and genuinely a amazing person but I went to a family party with him but that's it..I kissed him but that's not a big deal...because I kissed him to see if I can have the feeling I get when I'm around you.."
I look up at and he couldn't hide his smile.
"We are here..." he takes his wand out and a door appears.
"I'll see you tomorrow Montague" he smiled at me. His eyes twinkled in the moonlight.
"This has been quite the eventful weekend huh.."
"One I'll never forget"
I put my hand out to shake his hand right when he tries to go in for a hug. We then awkwardly try again failing.
"Umm I'm just going to go" I looked at him as he stood their awkwardly.
I walk away and finally make it to my dorm room. I walk in to see a beautiful dark green box on my bed with a note card saying. "I kept my promise new griffyndor scarf and gloves as promised. Yours, B.Z"
I smiled at him remember something so stupid. He really does seem to care about me but everything with Fred feels different. I think deep down I'm still in love with him..