~Let Me Love You~

33. What Are We ?

A/N :- Sorry to disappoint but this chapter is only for Park and Lam..🙈

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Lam's P.O.V. ~

As soon as I came out of Forth's office I punched the wall on the hallway in frustration.

I'm not angry I just.. I don't know what I feel about this because I get both sides and both are dear to me.. I don't want to see any of them getting hurt.

I really hope Forth will think about it maturely and would talk to Beam.

I am not really in the mood of office today so after giving needed instructions to Veronica and telling her not to disturb Forth I left the building for my home.

I really need to calm myself and maybe sleep for the whole day to ease this unsettling feeling.

I'm not very great person with emotions so I usually stay away from people when I don't feel like myself because either they will get the blunt dissing or the ugly truth.

I entered in my apartment and as soon I opened the door I was surprised to see Park in the kitchen.

"Owhh.. You came early.. I was planning to give you a surprise and a tasty dinner." The visible disappointment on his face made me feel like a culprit.

I gave him a key of my home so he can come and go whenever he please..

Silly me.. We aren't even boyfriends..

"When did you come back in the country.?" I asked because he was out of the country for some business deal and I haven't seen him for so long.

"I came back this morning and ran to meet you but you had already left for office so I decided to give you a surprise and a fabulous dinner but... Anyway how are you..?" He asked hugging me so tightly hiding his face in my neck after pecking my lips gently.

I don't know it is the frustration or anger but I pushed him away from me slowly to look at him.

"You came today and ran here to meet me.?" I asked.

"Yeah.. Why..? Aren't you happy to see me.?" He answered me and asked after with the confused look.

"Why..?" I asked staring at him deeply.

"What why..?" He chuckled not getting the building anger inside me.

"Why would you come to see me.. What are we.?" I asked with my ragged breathes and he didn't answer me.

"What are we Park.. Who are we to each other.. I can't just avoid it anymore.. Call me selfish or whatever but I need something to hold on.. A name a tag a status a label.. whatever.. But tell me what we are. I can't go on like this assuming things in my head just to be disappointed or thrown away in the end. Yes I'm selfish but I want this to be all or nothing.." I yelled out everything on his face.

I can't go on like this.. I have seen Forth and Beam and what the mere assumption can do to a loving relationship.. Communication is must and if we want this to go on we need to be honest to each other and tell what we think or feel.

"I don't want to be just a fuck buddy of yours.." I whispered avoiding his eyes.

Yes it's fucking hard to say what's in your mind but we both need to be at the same page. Even though I can feel he loves me too but I need to hear it from his mouth.

My heart was beating rapidly and his silence was making me feel suffocated.

I was waiting for his answer silently not showing the building pain in my heart on my face.