A Drop in the Ocean

Chapter 38

I take the key out of my bag and slide it into the slot, unlocking the door.  Luke is laying in his bed, eyes slowly falling shut until I slam the door.  He sits up immediately and looks over at me, his eyes automatically narrowing.  

"Look at who finally decided to show up," he said.  I rolled my eyes.  I threw my bag down on the table.  

"Like you even give a shit," I retorted, slipping off my shoes.  

"I don't.  I was being sarcastic," he told me, swinging his legs off the edge of the bed.  

"Trust me, I know.  Sarcasm, one of the many services I offer," I replied, gesturing to myself.  He rolled his eyes.  

"You know, I spent about an hour comforting Adeline," he said.

"She'll get over it," I told him, digging through my bag for my book and my phone.  Finally, I pulled It's Kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vizzini out of my bag.  A story about depression.  Let's just say that I identified with it a bit.  I set the book and my phone on the table, turning back to him.

"I don't know if she will.  You said some pretty mean shit to her," Luke told me.  

"Well, not everyone is going to like you.  And some people don't realize that," I replied.  

"Is that what happened with you?  Is that why you're such a bitch?" he asked.  I narrowed my eyes at him, but I didn't answer.  I turned back to my bag, rummaging through it.

"Oh, I met some fans tonight.  They really love you.  I don't know why, considering the fact that you're a selfish prick," I told him.  I turned just in time to see his jaw clench.  I gave him a smug grin.

"I can't deal with this," he told me, standing.  I raised an eyebrow at him.

"What do you mean?" I asked.  

"I'm going to go room with the boys," he replied.  

"Good riddance.  I was going to ask you to leave anyways," I said.  He grabbed his pillow and his key, standing from the bed.

"You know, if you were nicer, people might actually like you," he told me, his face close to mine.  

"Really?  Is that why I spent about an hour catching up with some old friends?" I asked.  He gave me a look.  

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I met with some old friends tonight.  And it was so much better than spending any time with you," I replied.  He shook his head and began to walk towards the door.  I turned to watch him leave.  Before he stepped out the door, he turned back to me.

"What happened to us, Jordan?" he asked me.  I finally felt the weight settle on my shoulders.  Weight of all of the shit that has happened.

"I really don't know.  I wish I did, but if you haven't noticed, I kind of take things as they come.  Which is a really shitty way of dealing with life," I told him.  He nodded and turned back to the hallway, shutting the door softly behind him.  I suddenly felt regret and guilt washing over me in a tsunami.  Feelings.  I forgot what those were like.  I noticed that our view was pretty great, so I shut off most of the lights except for a little one, put on my pajamas, grabbed a blanket and pillow, and curled up in the window sill, knowing that I wouldn't be sleeping tonight.