you are loved. - r.lupin (ft. THE s.black)

eggo waffles

a/n: i know i said i wasn't updating but my parents were fighting downstairs so i guess you could say i had inspiration

Sirius was broken and he was scared.

He acted like he was fine for Caroline, because he was glad to have her back again and he just wanted things to go back to how they were, years ago. But Caroline noticed how he'd changed, how he acted differently.

Sirius slept differently. He used to sleep with an arm around Caroline's waist and her back to him but now, Sirius clung to Caroline like she might disappear if he didn't grip her tight enough. Their legs were intertwined and Caroline faced him, her head buried into Sirius' chest. He held her firmly, feeling the warmth of her against him. 

Sirius watched her figure softly late at night, when Caroline had passed out hours ago. Sirius was tired as well but he thought Caroline might vanish in the blink of an eye. 

He ate differently too. He tried to use forks or chopsticks or spoons, depending on the occasion, but sometimes, he'd just eat with his fingers and tear the food apart, into shreds, and sometimes he would chew with his mouth open.

Caroline never complained, it was not her place to do so. She'd heard stories about how Azkaban changed people and how they went insane over the years but Sirius seemed to be somewhat fine to her.

He carried himself with the same confident poise and he kissed her the same way. But there was this flicker in his eyes, like they were more dull and less full of light than they used to be. It hurt Caroline to see that. 

Caroline had awoken around an hour before Sirius but she didn't dare move, in fear of waking him from his slumber. She watched him with a soft gaze, analyzing every little part of him that she hadn't bothered to see years ago.

She saw a small birthmark right under Sirius' eye that was barely visible because of his dark eyelashes. She noticed how Sirius' lips twitched every couple minutes and she noticed the small white scar at the very edge of his sculpted face, right by his left cheekbone.

Sirius felt Caroline's breathing on his collarbone and his grey eyes opened, peering down at Caroline. She noticed this and smiled, wiggling upwards a bit, so they were face to face. 

Sirius couldn't help himself as his thin lips were tugged upwards into a huge grin. His hands drifted towards Caroline's face and he cupped it, bringing her closer to him. Sirius kissed her deeply, enjoying the feeling of Caroline's warm lips against his. 

"I love you," Sirius mumbled.

"I love you too," she replied sweetly. Caroline started to back away and slip out of the bed but Sirius desperately grabbed her hand, pulling her back. 

"Where are you going?"

"The bathroom," she answered.

"I'll go with you," Sirius offered, starting to leave the bed as well. 

"Sirius..."

Caroline raised her eyebrows and Sirius let out a sigh. He didn't want to be away from Caroline any longer and he didn't know if she was going to come back or not, but he tried not to show it. "Fine, but come back right after," Sirius pleaded. 

"I will, don't worry," Caroline giggled and left their bedroom. 

But Sirius worried. He sat on their bed with his back against the headboard and his eyes scanned their bedroom frantically, looking for something to do. The raven-haired man got up and moved over to a hanging photo of Caroline and Severus. 

He scowled. "Can't believe a picture of Snivellous is hanging in my bedroom," he sneered. Sirius wanted to take it down but he knew that Caroline would be upset if he did. So, he covered Caroline's face in the picture with one hand so she wouldn't see and he held up his middle finger for Snivellous with the other hand.

Not knowing what else to do, he drifted back to his bed and impatiently waited for Caroline to come back. Caroline appeared in the doorway around a minute later and Sirius' face lit up like a child's face on Christmas day. 

"Did you miss me?" she teased.

"Yes, very very much," Sirius answered quickly. He held his arms out and motioned for her to come closer, to which Caroline obliged. He wrapped his arms around her again and brought her closer until they couldn't possibly get any closer. 

Sirius inhaled Caroline's sweet scent that smelled like home. He couldn't quite put his finger on the exact smell but he loved it because it was what Caroline smelled like. 

Suddenly, both their noses were filled with the smell of... bacon? They looked at each other with confusion on their faces. 

"Did you-"

"Did you-"

They both spoke at the same time and it only made them more confused. "Care, did you learn how to cook in the past 12 years?" 

"I still can't cook. Do they teach culinary school in Azkaban?" 

"No, unless taking the moldy parts off the bread counts," Sirius replied. Caroline raised her eyebrows. "What? Mold is like living organisms so when I ate that moldy bread, it was like getting more nutrients."

"Did you even pay attention in school?"

"Merlin no," Sirius laughed. "Okay, but seriously, we have to see what that smell is because one of us might have forgotten to stop the microwave."

"Siriusly," Caroline giggled. Sirius just shook his head and grabbed her hand as he pulled her down the stairs and into the kitchen. Both their jaws dropped when they saw Remus cooking. 

"You know how to cook?" Sirius asked in shock. 

"It's bacon and pancakes," Remus replied. "Those are like the easiest foods to make. I thought I'd make something to thank you for letting me live here."

"I love you, Moony," Sirius sighed as he grabbed a piece of bacon from the plate and stuffed it into his mouth. "Hey! It's not burnt!"

"How pleasant," Caroline commented happily. 

"You should be on that muggle cooking show, Chopped," Sirius commented. Caroline helped Remus set the table and they began to eat breakfast. 

"Moony, do you mind making breakfast all the time?" Sirius asked while eating the pancakes with his hands, stuffing in as many as possible without choking. "I know it's a lot to ask but neither of us can cook and this is much better than what we normally have to eat."

"Sure, I'll cook. It's the least I could do. But if you guys don't cook, what have you been eating?" Remus asked. 

Caroline looked at Sirius, who looked at his plate shamefully. "We still can't get the toaster oven right," Sirius sighed, "so we eat frozen Eggo waffles. They're not that bad, actually. We kinda let them... thaw a bit and they taste okay, like dry... cold... soggy waffles... but it's honestly not that bad. I prefer this much more."

"You can't work the toaster oven?" Remus asked, clearly not believing that. But then again, he noticed that the inside of the microwave had something exploded inside and the toaster oven had what looked like melted cheese on the bottom. "Didn't you guys read the manual that comes with them?"

Sirius made a 'is this guy serious' face at Caroline. (a/n: imagine ron's face when him and harry met hermione and she goes 'well it's not a very good spell, is it?' that's the face that sirius made)

"Manual?" Sirius repeated with a bark-like laugh. "Reading?"

"Oh God," Remus sighed, burying his face in his hands. "After this, I need to teach you two how to use the microwave and the toaster oven. It's much easier when you actually know what you're doing."

"And the stove," Caroline added sheepishly.

"The stove- you guys don't know how to- just- oh God," Remus repeated sadly.