Chapter 1- You Can't Ignore the Past

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One month after Garcia was shot, Amanda spent two weeks helping Kristen get over Scott breaking up with her only for her own relationship to end two weeks after. Exactly two months after Garcia's shooter was killed in the BAU, Amanda confronted Spencer about their relationship. They were sitting on her couch watching some stupid movie that neither one was really paying attention to before Amanda turned to him. The conversation had started with her asking how he thought Garcia was holding up as they had just finished her first case back. 

From there, the conversation moved closer and closer to them and the moment they started to talk about anything serious pertaining to them, Spencer tried to kiss her. In the two and a half months they had been together, Amanda noticed that since the night they got together Spencer has not talked about anything personal between the two of them. Any time it started to move in that direction, he would kiss her or move his hand onto her thigh and slowly trail it up to distract her and she was sick of it.

"What the hell, Spencer?"

"What?" He asks defensively.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. Last I checked, couples talked about things like themselves. They didn't just have sex all the time."

"What do we need to talk about? We know everything about each other from the years we've known each other."

"Really," she challenges. 

"Yes. I know that your favorite color is blue. Your favorite food is steak and your favorite show is, for whatever reason, The Vampire Diaries," he tells her matter-of-factly and she glares at him.

"Blue was Lacey's favorite color. Mine was Mint Green that you said looked blue. My favorite food hasn't been steak since I was 18 after I went to this fancy restaurant with Director Adams and I got food poisoning because it wasn't cooked. And my favorite show is Supernatural and has been for the last 8 years. So yes Spencer, we do have stuff to talk about because, newsflash, we missed out on like 8 years of each other's lives." He glares at her in anger.

"Why would I want to talk about the time we weren't together? We're together now. Isn't that enough?"

"No, Spencer. It's not because we aren't really together. We never go on dates. We stay in all the time because you don't want the team to know, which I don't care about but you do so I go with it. We never talk. All we ever do is have sex. Sex doesn't make a relationship, Spencer. It may be a factor but a relationship can't be solely based on sex because then it's just fuck buddies."

"What's wrong with that?" He tries and she scoffs.

"What's wrong is that every guy I've ever been with, with the exception of Evan, was just about sex. That's all any guy ever sees me as is someone to fuck until they're bored and I don't want that anymore. I don't want that with you." He considers her words before speaking.

"Then maybe we should break up." Her head shoots up to look at him but he's looking at his hands.

"What?"

"Maybe we just shouldn't be together. Maybe we just don't work. Maybe too much has happened." She looks at him and feels the hurt flood her body but she quickly turns it to anger. She won't let herself be sad. She won't let him hurt her again.

"Fine," she snarls and his head snaps up to hers. "You're right. Too much time clearly has gone by because you're not the Spencer I thought you were. You aren't the one you pretended to be the night you told me you loved me and said that you knew you didn't deserve me because of how much you had hurt me. You're a liar and the Spencer I loved was anything but a liar."

"Amanda-" he starts, realizing his mistake but it's too late.

"No. Get out. You were right. We were just fooling ourselves into thinking we could be anything more than fuck buddies but I don't want to do that anymore, so leave." He opens his mouth to speak before deciding it's of no use and nodding. He stands and leaves, turning to look at her once more before leaving. When he gets home, he thinks of how he can fix things not realizing just how badly he had messed up. 

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