TAMARA | COMPLETED

Chapter 28

Darin has been so quiet since we came back from our walk and talk. I finished brushing my teeth and looked in the mirror. I looked so happy. I smiled and it was the most gorgeous smile I've ever shown. All along all I was missing to look this happy and glow from within was love and fun.

I went out and headed to the bed. He was watching a movie, seems like he's really concentrating. I got in bed and he just ignored me, usually he brings me closer to his chest. Is he mad I haven't told him my plan? Seriously?

"Darin" he looked at me with a straight face. "You're quiet"
"I'm watching a movie that's why."
"You've been quiet since our walk and talk you only started watching this movie 30 minutes ago" he looked away "what's going on? Did I do something wrong?" He sighed.

"Tamara I love you and if I see you can't love me back then I have to distance myself from you so I can be heartbroken in peace." What? I looked around to make sure he's really talking to me.

"Are you..? Wait what ar-?" I cachinnated curtly. "Darin what the hell are you talking about?" He was hiding his emotions I couldn't figure ou what he was thinking. What the hell is going on with this boy? "Are you going to just hit me a bomb then stare at me like that?"

"Tamara I don't mean to upset you-?"
"What do you mean I don't love you?" He kept quiet "so you don't trust me anymore?"
I raised my voice a little bit.
"Tama-" I cut in
"Answer me!"
"Okay fine wanna know why I-"
"Just get to the point!"
"You gave your nanny a FREAKING ORGASM! That's why I'm upset. At first it was funny but then I realised you only started having her around recently actually it was around the the time you and I started being closer to each other. What the hell do you think that says to me? You fuck others while we're together? You don't love me if you sexually please others while we're together. That's cheating if you ask me."

"That was before we were together. We've been together for three days how the hell did I fucking cheat?" He nose exhale laughed.

"You had feelings for me before we started a relationship and you know it and that was before your nanny came along." He looked straight into my eyes as if he wants to see if I'll deny.

"I'm not going to deny that but I was confused okay. I was in denial all along that I am bi. What happened with Nina was an eye opener for me because that's when  I realised that I was." He kept quiet. "I was wrong to do what I did to her yes but that was when I still had the mentality of just having fun"

"So you are just having fun with me? Tamara do I look li-" I sighed.

"Baby listen, with girls it's different. I am always in control. I'm a virgin yes but I'm actually more experienced than you think." He snorted "so that's what I loved about being with a girl. I loved the dominance I got from that but then you came along and when I started falling for you I got a little scared. I thought I'd be deprived of that dominance I love so much. I thought you'd always get to take control so I was scared I'd....." I took a deep breath. "That I'd seem weak." He looked at me perplexed.

"But Sugar you're not weak." I nodded.

"I know. Trust me I now know but then I thought I would be if I was with you, so it was confusing because my heart just wanted you and nobody else. The same day shit happened with Nina I went to Doc, she encouraged me to try a relationship with you and see where it goes. If I feel it weakens me then I know what to do but I shouldn't live in fear of thinking I'd be weak whereas I will not." He nodded "so later that day I went to apologise to Nina and promised to control myself from wanting to bang her every time I see her. I've been faithful ever since I promise" he giggled.

"You were loyal before we even made it official." I nodded and grinned.

"Darin listen I've never been with a guy before I don't know how to react or do certain things so this love shit is new to me. I'm sorry I wasn't honest because if I told you beforehand we wouldn't be here talking about it." He smiled as if ecstatic.