Tris Prior

Chapter 39.

Tobias POV|

I should of been there for her. I should of made sure she was okay. I didn't know she was this sad to the point were she wanted to kill herself. If she had taken that last pill, she would have died in my arms. But she didn't. She didn't die. She is alive.

Breathing.

She lays there in the hospital bed, her hair flowing over her shoulders and framing her face. The honey glow from her hair has faded. Her lips are pink and her cheeks are pale.

She doesn't look like the Tris I first met standing in the hall way having trouble with her locker, the Tris that stared at me a little longer when she was first introduced to me, she doesn't look like that Tris I knew.

She looks broken. If I push or touch her to hard enough, she will shatter into a million pieces and they will spread so far apart, that she won't be able to put herself back together again. She won't ever be the same again.

But this is MY Tris, she will make it. I can feel it.

I am sitting on a chair beside the hospital bed. I am holding her hand. Her nails are bitten to the beds, I can see bits of dried up blood. It's been 3 days since the incident and I have been here 24/7 just looking at her. The heart monitor beeps slowly.

I told the group about what happened, they feel bad about not noticing her behaviour to feel this way. They visited yesterday. Nothing has really happened since then. The doctors told be a few days ago that Tris has Anorexia. They have recorded that she hasn't eaten in 6 and a half days. And I wasn't there for her.

"I'm sorry Tris" I whisper against her hand placing my lips to her palm. As I pull my lips away, her hand moves and her eyes flicker open, revealing her beautiful Hazel eyes.

"Tobias?" She says, confused.

"Hey Tris" I say smiling.

"What am I doing here? I'm supposed to be dead!" She shouts. Tears flow out of her eyes.

"No. Your not meant to be dead. Beatrice Prior, you are not aloud to leave me! Don't ever do that again! You scared the living daylights out of me. I'm sorry wasn't there for you. I'm sorry" I say.

"What's makes you think you have a choice? It's my life." She exclaims.

"But your My Tris. You can't leave me." I say.

"I love you" I say.

"I love you more" she says.
"I love you most" I smile.

"Forever?" She says looking into my sparkling brown eyes,
I kiss her lips,
"Forever"

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Tris POV
Why am I still alive? I'm meant to be in the fields of happiness, not in the fields of pain. Tobias told me that I wasn't aloud to leave him and I understand that but I just don't want to be here anymore. Why live when your going to die anyways?

I'm lying in the hospital bed with more cords and monitors stuck to me. I have the urge to pull them out, because they are the things keeping me alive. The heart monitor beeps slowly.

Tobias is next to me, asleep. He hasn't slept in 3 days. I remember sending the message to the group. I reach over and grab my iPhone which is located beside me and unlock the screen. I have 6 messages, each from the person I sent it to.

Christina said: 'please Tris, stay alive'

Zeke said: 'it's okay, no matter what happens I/we are here for you'

Will said: 'missing you heaps, please come back'

Shauna said: 'I love you Tris, you will make this, I know it'

Uriah said: 'Please stay alive Tris, I love you so much to lose you. Please'

Lynn says: please come back, please'

I am in tears by the end of reading all the messages. I didn't know I meant that much to them. I thought I was just a come and go. I thought they just took me in because they felt bad. But they didn't. I mean heaps to them. They took me in because they wanted me to be there. And I didn't see that the whole time.

I need to stay alive for them.

I see that now.

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Did you really think I was gonna kill Tris? Nahhh!💖

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