Red Vs Blue, & there's Magenta: Recreation

Chapter 10 Lay of the Land

Simmons: Donut, where've have you been?

The pink soldier arrived near Red base and regrouped with Simmons and Lopez.

Donut; Just seeing if the Blue guys have anything valuable to move out. You know, before you burn it to the ground? Caboose asked me to house sit.

Simmon: Do they have anything valuable?

Donut: Well, I'm not gonna tell you! You'll just find it and burn it.

Simmons: Yeah, that's true. But tell me anyway.

Donut: Nah, there's not much over there. Just some spare parts from Caboose's "Build a New Best Friend" project. And it looks like he took that AI unit with him.

Simmons: So dumb. Wait, what? AI unit?!

Donu: Yeah, it was kind of cool. It was purple and it liked to hear old stories about-

Simmons: What?! He kept that?! He wasn't supposed to keep that! We thought he turned it in! That was part of the deal for getting our bases. We had to turn over all our equipment! Why didn't South or Sister do anything?!

Donut: You're talking to me about things that really don't make any sense. I've been kinda gone. I don't know if you noticed.

Simmons: I need to tell Sarge and have him get it back from that idiot. *turns on radio* Sarge, come in Sarge. Sarge, do you read?!

All he heard was static.

Simmons: *groans* Damn it. Hey Lopez!

Lopez: Sí?

Simmons: Is the radio busted?

Lopez: (Spanish): Busted radio. How come no one ever wants to talk to me about anything else?

Simmons: The radio! No work? Call Sarge-o. Yes or no?

Lopez: (Spanish) You speak English worse than I do. (English) Sí. Radio. Bueno. (Spanish) Butt. Up yours.

Simmons: Then! How come! I can't! Get Sarge?!

Lopez: (Spanish) Maybe their radio is busted, Einstein.

Simmons: Can! You! Fix! It?!

Lopez: (Spanish) Can I fix their radio, from here? Sure. Because I am magic. I am a magic robot.

Simmons: How come, in all these years of working with us, you haven't managed to learn one single word of English?

Lopez: (Spanish) I don't know. Probably trying to avoid conversations like that.

*At Sandtrap*

The Reds and Blues stood before Smith and the man in E.O.D.

?: Now, surely you've heard of the treaties between aliens and people. We're here to investigate an energy reading. Rules are, now, if they find one of these things, all investigation teams have to have at least one person and one alien. No exceptions.

Sarge: What kind of energy reading?

?: I can't tell you that. In fact, I need you to leave this area ASAP. The alien diplomats will get mighty suspicious if they find another human squad showed up. We don't want to cause an intergalactic incident.

Caboose: Ah, we're used to doing that.

South: Ahem, what he means is that we're used to following protocol.

?: Good, then you guys just head one your way, and we don't need to report this to anybody.

Grif: Dude, we're not going anywhere. Our jeep is wrecked.

As if on queue, the jeep exploded behind them.

Kaikaina: And we don't have enough room on the plane.

?: Damn. Okay, we'll help you repair your jeep, and then you're gone. Couple of rules while you're here. This is a restricted dig site. Everything here is property of the military. Do not go looking for any artifacts! And do not go anywhere without telling me. Got it?

Grif/Kaikaina: Yes mom, we got it.

?: Okay, quick quiz then. What are you gonna do if you find an artifact?

Caboose: Not take-

Ruby(Allison): We won't find one. We aren't going to look.

?: Exactly. You are not going to find an artifact because you're not going to be looking for an artifact.

South: *nods* Yes, we understand.

?: Are you sure? Are we clear?

Caboos: Yes.

?: Are. We! Clear?!

Everyone: Yes!

?: Okay, then head down there. On the left, you'll find some wrecked jeeps you can scavenge for parts. There's also water down there on the left too. Keep yourselves hydrated. You want some chow? It's with the water on the left.

Sarge: Thanks, and we'll be leaving as soon as we can.

?: Yes, you will.

The group began moving to one of the pyramids.

Grif: Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking?

Sarge: Yeah, something doesn't seem right.

Caboose: I know, everything is on the left.

Ruby(Allison): Which is exactly why we're playing along. . . And exactly why I'm going to sneak around.

South: What?! That's risky.

Ruby(Allison): You're right. South, you're in charge. Here.

She handed South a small blue sphere.

Ruby(Allison): It's a hologram of me.

(A/N- Think of what the Heretic uses in Halo 2)

Ruby(Allison): If he shows back up, let Delta control it and mimic me. I'm going to be. . . busy. . . .

Grif: Good luck.

Ruby(Allison): Thanks, but I won't need it. . . .

The magenta armor turned invisible as her Active Camouflage activated. . . . 

Back with the alien and the man. . . .

Smith: *grunts*

?: No, I don't think they know anything. You get back to the temple and keep working on getting it open. I'll take care of these idiots.

Behind one of the pyramids was the dead bodies of the true investigation team. . . .