Viewpoint Variation (An Among Us Logic Fanfic)

Among Us Logic | The Return Of Novisor: MrEgg's POV

I know you invited me here to interview me about my horrendous, torturous, and despicably inhumane egg-speriences with Novisor. But I really would rather stall for as much time as I possibly can until I speak of that monstrous event, so I shall refrain from being on-topic for a while. Try to tell me that's unprofessional and stupid? I couldn't give a rotten egg. I can do what I want with this interview! I am the interviewee, after all! You chose me to do this for a reason, and so I shall control what and when I talk about that worse-than-nightmarish, egg-scrutiating and pain-inducing event to ever occur to this here mere egg! It was horrifying, and still is so to even THINK about! Why did it have to be me you invited here, and make me have to PURPOSEFULLY recall that egg-sperience I hate having to go through even more so than being trapped in the Cheater's Lobby for almost 2 months! Speaking of which.....

The rumours are true. When Captain and I came out victorious, thanks to Captain's zombification virus (another egg-straordinarily horrible transformation sensation), the Innerslogth gods confronted us face-to-face, ready to launch Captain down under, into the deep-seated, rotten horrors up the dumpster fire of a Dropship that was The Cheater's Lobby, but as the gods were just about to flick that little egg white into the hellish abyss, he pointed the blame squarely at ME, a sweet innocent little yolk! (Not quite the Yolk some of you may think of, just the actual noun, yolk) Those idiotic, imbecilic, incompetent, ignorant, impossibly IQ-less Innersloth immortals had no evidence to the contrary of that egg-stravagantly untrue accusation, they threw me into that flaring, heaping pile of junk and clunky physics instead! And now I feel scared of getting thrown there again, purple out of spite for that statement I made, calling them idiots in server all different alliterating adjectives I learnt from Sir Clogsworth whilst I was trapped down there in that cold, wet prison. don't judge me! I had to do SOMETHING, and I was running out of egg puns! I was slowly losing the will to crack them as well. But as you can tell, I sucked it back up into my shell of a cranium for this interview, as what would I be if not an egg-celent yolker! Hoo hoo! I am COOKING with puns today! Now back to my crippling mental state after 2 months of torrential torture.

After never being even remotely able to egg-cite that awful lobby for about 7 weeks, Sir Clogsworth FINALLY thought to mention the egg-scape method out of this mutant Dropship! It made no true sense in my context, as I wasn't even the cheater in the situation, so I SCREAMED to the heavens, and hoped I could get through to the godly grandmasters to LET ME OUT, and possibly let Captain in for his crimes against egg-kind!  And thank the bloody LORD they heard me, and fulfilled all of my requests! I was back, baby! Canonically this time, not just any of that Among Us Adventures rotten egg! And I couldn't WAIT to once again encounter the ONE person who I got through the mental asylum that was The Cheater's Lobby, and stare at their incredible face in person for once in the past 2 months! But TheGentleman was close enough.

———FASTFORWARD———

It was a couple days after my egg-ceptionally whisk-y egg-scape from The Cheater's Lobby (Cracked a lot of puns there! I'm REALLY trying to recover from that living, breathing triple-nightmare), and I just dropped into the Dropship again. There weren't many playing at that moment. Just the main 4 that usually do, and me. But Player and Veteran were acting.... strangely. Robotic. Barely even moving. TheGentleman suspected MrCheese and I had replaced some of the crew with robots again, like we did him and Captain a few months back, but we assured him these were apparently the REAL Player and Veteran. But we were obviously still concerned about them, acting as if in permanent shell shock, so we called up a 6th Crewmate to help. Ria. She was someone who donated an EGG-STRAORDINARILY high amount of cheddar for MrCheese's charity, and because of that, we promised her we would allow her to play with us sometime for doing that, for the children! Well, now was the perfect time to not only fulfill that promise, but also call in a reasonable human being to sort out these crushed-up messes of beans! But she had no idea either. Her best guess was similar to TheGentleman's but with seemingly less-advanced and more "realistic, in a way" robots. Or just 'bots' as she called them. We started the game anyway, and planned to just hope that Player and Veteran would wake up from their odd comatose state.

———IMPOSTOR———

I was The Impostor! With two EASY prey to cook, and serve, fried! But according to the rules wae lay the metaphorical Cafeteria table with, The Impostor was disallowed to interact/ mess with Player or Veteran in any way. In fact, we tucked them into the Medbay beds, so they would be RIGHt outta the way. So I had to look for alternate kills. After everyone left Medbay, I cracked open the vent, and scoured the HQ for killings. There were NONE. MrCheese and TheGentleman were showing Ria around our probably slightly-modified-because-this-lobby-makes-no-sense Mira HQ, all three standing side-by-side, practically holding hands. I'm pretty sure MrCheese and TheGentleman were actually holding hands. I have nothing wrong with that, don't get me wrong, I got over the Bitter Ex phase months ago, but still. I ha nothing to do! So I just waited. I set up my character on the Launchpad, and just waited around for something to happen. Eventually-egg-ly, something did! The little tour group circled back around to Launchpad, and as Ria left to go do her tasks elsewhere, I stayed with MrCheese and TheGentleman, hoping for either one of the combo to leave the area, so I could launch my padded steel knife into their hard-boiled heads! (See what I did there? I've egg-spanded my pun arsenal!) But that moment never came. So I just left them do complete their chores, whilst I searched the grounds for, I don't know, maybe a little RIA to maliciously slaughter! But when I found Ria, the impossible had occurred. (Well, IMPOSSIBLE in this lobby doesn't mean much, but you get what I bloody mean) Someone had BEATEN me to it. And knowing Player's history with cheats, and that he was standing over Ria's spilling flesh, I honestly suspected him. As LITERALLy The Impostor. Something was being devilled up.

———DEAD BODY REPORTED———

After the cheese-gratest egg-schange of delectable food puns with MrCheese, I explained the situation as I knew it. Accusing Veteran and Player of killing, even when I myself am The Impostor! The ONE Impostor! No-one else managed to grasp that issue though. And my questionings were able to find an answer! Player mentioned Novisor, which, although a HORRENDOUSLY egg-scruciating fate for poor Ria to have fallen into, was a likely truth. I didn't want to look like an utter yolk by agreeing wit him, though, so I just followed the flow, and ejected Veteran into what even HE called a bottomless pit of despair. (Also, again, not the Yolk some of you may think of)

———Veteran was not An Impostor———

After that was when.... IT happened. The unspeakable horrors of the Novisor curse were unleashed upon yours truly.... and it. Was. UNDESCRIBABLY egg-scrutiatingly awful! I could feel the burning pain coursing through my dairy veins, sizzling me slowly, before RIPPING my visor off from my own shell of a corpse! It was the most intense pain I have, and hopefully WILL, ever feel! And, to be truly honest, I'm GLAD my memory of the next few minutes was specklessly cleaned from my memory, as it gives me a CRACKING egg-scuse to leave this interview now, and never have to think about this again! And NEVER go into even THIS amount of detail ever again! GOODBYE!