Drive | Joult

Chapter 23

(Jennifer)

I start grabbing shirts out of the closet and throw them in his suitcase. I can't believe he's leaving today. He puts the rest of his stuff in and I run downstairs and leave him up there to finish.

I pace back and forth in the living room. Nick is leaving. Nick is leaving. Nick is leaving for a long time. It could takes months. What if he falls in love with Kristen? Why would he do that? He loves me! Oh my god, Nick is leaving! "Jennifer, are you okay?" I hear Nick ask, bringing me back to reality. I turn around and see him. "What? Yeah. Fine." I'm out of breath. "Why don't we go out for a bit? We can take Collin and Ali to the park and go on the trail, You know so the paparazzi can't find us." He suggests, looking at me concerned. Jesus, it's his last day here and I'm freaking him out. Get It together. "Yeah, I'll just be right back. Can you get Collin and Ali ready?" I ask, starting to walk to the bathroom. "Yeah." He walks towards their room.

I step into the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror. I'm all sweaty. I fix my hair and walk back to the living room. "Ready?" I look at Nick. He has Collin and Ali in their stroller. He nods and I carry the diaper bag, while he pushes the stroller.

We walk down the trail, so far unspotted by the paparazzi. That's good. I don't want anyone to know about the babies. I glance up at Nick and wonder how long we can keep this secret. "Nick, can we stop here for a second?" I ask, as we approach a closed off area, there are a few rocks big enough for us to sit on them. We stop and leave the stroller facing us and go to sit down on one of the rocks. It's smooth and a deep reddish-brown color. I look at Ali and Collin, both asleep in their stroller. How am I gonna take care of them alone? I look up at Nick and he seems just as worried as I am. I know he doesn't want to leave any more than I want him too, but he still wants to have a career. I would never want to get in the way of that. "Nick, I just want you to know that I love you and I trust you, and whatever happens I think that we can get through it so just try not to worry about it." I must sound so stupid, but I have to say something. This is our last day together and we shouldn't spend it on anxious glances and awkward silences. I keep my eyes locked onto his, even though I'm starting to cry. He leans in to kiss me and I wrap my arms around his neck. I kiss him back and tangle my fingers into his hair. I love him, more than I've ever loved anyone and I know he feels the same.

I lay in bed, with an empty, aching feeling in my heart. Nicks gone, I'll still have Laura for awhile before the loneliness takes over and I'm left completely alone.

A/N: holy shit my feels are broken I wasn't even sure I shipped Joult until this moment I am crying so hard omfg MY BABIES