THIS ISNT GOODBYE

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                          Chapter thirty nine

                          Chapter thirty nine

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Today was the day. The day I was finally going home, if you could call a school your home. Mum decided it would be best to be at school for as long as possible until Dumbledores end. She cried everyday and the more and more she did the worse it made me feel.

I was leaving her, just like how she did all those years ago, but I understand now. She did it to keep me safe, not because I wasn't wanted. She always wanted me same goes for Remus. All they did was for me.

"Got everything?" My mum asked as she tied my hair up into a tight bun.

"Yep. Thanks for the books" I said.

"You're welcome." She replied tucking the stray hairs behind my ears. She kissed my forehead and then grabbed my bag from the floor passing it to me.

I could already see the tears forming in her eyes but she was holding onto them like her life depended on it. She was desperately trying not to break down but I knew she couldn't hold on for long.

"This isn't goodbye" I told her, taking her hand and squeezing to hard.

She pulled me into her arms and cried. Letting her tears escape from her eyes. She sobbed into my shoulder soaking my t-shirt with the tears. She couldn't hold on any longer, she had let go and falling.

"I know, I know" She mumbled into my neck. "I just wish it didn't have to be like this"

"I wish too but I'll see you soon, promise" I held my pinky out.

She looked at me confused until she put her pinky out and wrapped it round mine. I smiled and gave her one last hug before turning away from her and leaving the house I had been locked up in for months on end.

I had passed Draco's birthday and June was coming to an end. I'd only be at Hogwarts for a few more weeks when I arrive back.

God I missed everyone. I never got to say goodbye, to anyone. I just left with no warning. I miss Mae and Nat I'm a terrible friend for not even trying to get a message to them. I just sat at the desk in the library drawing my life away. I mean I did finish the drawing b I should of been trying to talk to my friends.

I can't just show up after weeks and say 'hi'.  They'll go crazy. I wouldn't blame them if they ignore me and leave me for myself.

I don't even want to think about Draco. I was supposed to be there for him and then one day I just disappeared with no warning. Merlin I've got some explaining to do.

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