When I See You Again

Part 27

Stevie lay awake the following morning, starting at nothing in particular. She wasn't surprised to find Lindsey still in bed with her. He was asleep, his arm protectively wrapped around her. She didn't move, she didn't want to move and disturb him. She didn't want to wake him up, but mostly, she knew, the peaceful, quiet moment was likely going to be over, once he opened his eyes.

In a way Stevie was disappointed in herself. She was letting her guard down even though she had promised herself not to. If she wanted to admit it or not, Lindsey had changed within a very short period of time. Maybe it was because of him becoming a father soon or maybe he stilled hoped to get her back, that Stevie didn't know. Nevertheless, she was proud of him. If a year ago, someone had told her that Lindsey would stop drinking, she would have laughed in the person's face. 

There was this voice in her head, which Stevie tried to ignore. She couldn't help but wondered if maybe she was too quick. Maybe she should have given Lindsey that chance and waited. She wouldn't have had to call him the night before, he would have been there already. 

A weak smile tugged at her lips, when she felt Lindsey press a kiss to the back of her head and his hold on her tightened. He was awake. Stevie didn't want to be the first one to speak up, but she was also afraid of what Lindsey might say if she stayed quiet for too long.

Lindsey leaned in closer and whispered. "You snore."

Laughing lightly, Stevie slapped his arm. "I don't want to know that."

"Not very loudly though, it didn't bother me enough to keep up." He said, inhaling deeply, he yawned. 

"I thought, you were going to leave." She placed her hand over his, trying to let him know that she was just wondering.

"I wasn't really planning on leaving. I just didn't say anything, because I knew, you would have made me go." Lindsey answered her honestly and not without great effort, she turned onto her other side to face him. 

"You know me too well."

That wasn't the response he had expected. "We know each other too well." He said and cupped her cheek, his thumb slowly brushing over her soft skin. "I miss you, Steph."

"Lindsey..." Stevie sighed, closing her eyes.

"I miss us." He emphasized. "I know, I promised you, I wouldn't say anything, but it's how I feel. I hate keeping all these feelings bottled up inside. I can't exactly stop loving you. God knows, I've tried."

Stevie swallowed uneasily, covering his hand with her own. "You have?"

"Does that surprise you?" She shook her head. "Of course, I have. Ever since you'd left me. When you got together with Don, Joe, Mick..." He stopped himself, thinking that if he continued, things could go very wrong. "My point is, I've tried to move on. It's taken me years and I still haven't figured out yet how to do that."

She hesitated for a second. "I know you're back together with Cheri."

Lindsey stilled, wondering, why she wasn't mad yet. "How?"

Stevie shrugged, entwining their fingers together, she held their joined hands in between them. "Do you love her?"

"No." Lindsey didn't have to think about it. "She's just there. You know me, Stevie. You know that I don't do well on my own. All we do is fight. She's angry because I spend most of my time in the studio, because I visit you, because I left last night to come to you."

"Why haven't you broken up with her if you miss us?" 

Sighing heavily, now Lindsey gave a shrug of his shoulders. "Honestly? I don't know. I guess, I've giving up hope of getting you back."

"Have you really?" Stevie asked, holding his gaze. She didn't need him to answer in words. 

"I'll never give up hope." He shook his head. "Do you love Rick?"

"I barely know him. I know, I like him and that he's good to me."

It wasn't easy, listening to that, but Lindsey couldn't remember the last time they had such a truthful conversation, so he kept his mouth shut. "Do you see a future with him? Having his children? Marrying him?"

"Lindsey, I don't know." She was beginning to sound annoyed, so he didn't push. 

"What are we doing, Steph? Don't you think that we're wasting time? I've told you, I'm ready to be the kind of man you need. You just have to let me in." Lindsey was nearly pleading, he brought her hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. 

After a long pause, Stevie replied. "I think, you should go, Lindsey. You're expected at home and I don't want to be the cause of another argument with your girlfriend."