Olympus Drive Book 3: According to Plan

Chapter 65

Helen

"Hi um---Stamos said to call this number or another one if something weird is reported and so I---"

"Yes yes what is it? I need like three kids at least," I sigh, tiredly. This is a ridiculous night.

"---So I am calling you because there was a report of a break in at the elementary school, and someone is using the band room speakers to play the Moulin Rouge soundtrack really loudly---,"

"Yep, sounds like someone who belongs to me. Thank you," I say, hanging up, "Elementary school you know where that is?"

"Yeah. I have a kid. So do you. Remind me why I go places with you again?" I woke Luke up to make him drive me places.

"Because I haven't told your husband you were screwing the hot girl that was dating my son," I say, smiling.

"Right," he mutters, "Where is Basil, these are his kids?"

"You say that like that makes him helpful at finding them."

"Fair."

When we get to the school there is, sure enough, music blasting from one of the rooms. Upon investigation the blinds to that particular classroom are sealed shut, the metal welded together, as is the door to the school.

"Bash it in," I say, motioning to the door.

"And wind up on Basil's chore chart for destroying public property?" Luke asks, hands on his hips.

"Fine then flood the room," I sigh.

"And wind up Basil's chore chart for destroying public property?"

"What good are you?"

"None! I don't know why you insisted on bringing me."

"Useless," I mutter, climbing up the wall a little to peek in an upper window, "Oh they're all in there! Mine plus the bastards."

"Are they---" Luke leans he doesn't have to climb, "Who's the one in the pink shirt and running shoes?"

I look at him, "Yours?"

"No???? Is not????"

"Basil says that's your bastard," I say, pointing at it, "He found it tied up to the porch and he's been feeding it."

"Sister, I have not been with a woman since high school—not until Anna," he sighs, "Not biologically possible. Not my kid."

"Then where did it come from?"

"Wow, what a big fucking mystery where the fuck would we get another scrappy kid that looks exactly fucking like Basil I think we're gonna need a team of experts to---,"

"That asshole—,"

"You sound surprised. I'm not understanding why at this point in our lives you're still surprised," Luke says, condescendingly.

"He conceived that brat while I was pregnant with Elena? Or Juno—it's right in there," really? He was sleeping around while I was pregnant with his child?

"Again—how are you still shocked by our brother's depths of sluttiness? This isn't even a new sluttiness level," Luke sighs.

"Yes it is! I had just gotten back then AND I was either carrying or nursing his kid—,"

"Again. Not a new sluttiness level, do you want me to list how many sexual partners he had while Jasmine was a baby? Because I can't; it's more than I can count on my hands which is too many," Luke says, "Look, it fits right in and the other kids like it—so what?"